Restoration

Chapter 04

There are a lot of people here. Nobody wearing a dress, hat, or old fashion. I find it very creepy that everyone is so over-friendly. Hugs? Who still uses those? I try to stay as close to Natasha as possible. Please don't be crazy when you leave here, I think to myself.
"Hi, how are you?" a lady asked me nicely. She has dark curly hair and wears a yellow shirt with black pants.
"I'm good and you?" I respond trying to keep my smile. I don't care how anybody feels. That's just me. You can feel at your lowest or your greatest and I'll feel nothing about it.
"Blessed with the best," she giggles and looks at Natasha then back at me. "Well, welcome. I know you will enjoy it just as much as we do."

It's not bad. Honestly, it's not bad at all. The music is great. There's a live band on the stage and everyone is clapping hands, singing, and dancing! Natasha is right, this is very different.
"What do we do when we find ourselves in the desert?" the pastor asks walking up and down on the stage. It's not annoying, it's quite satisfying. "You can be in the desert but in the presence of God it can feel like heaven."
The sermon went on and it's funny that I didn't nearly fall asleep once. Whenever I'm about to zone out, somebody jumps up and I'm surrounded by clapping and screaming. The nice thing about this church is that there are old people and of course young people, it's not quiet and nobody is falling asleep.
"How was it?" Natasha asks walking out of the building with me. I look at her and raise an eyebrow.
"I'm never coming back here again," I say to her and fold my arms. Okay, so maybe I'm too proud to admit that she was right. "When is the next service, though?"
"Tonight," she replies and inhales deeply.
"Pick me up, will you?" I ask. She starts to laugh and nods her head. I feel my face warm up and look down to hide it. "Even if I refuse. I know this is what I need."
"I'll kidnap you," she giggles and put her arm in mine. "Wednesday, we come together and discuss the word of God. They immediately pulled me in as soon as I came in here. It's so nice, Eleanor. This is the best choice I've ever made. Maybe you should bring Andrea and Sean with you."
"Where's Craig?" I ask. She inhales deeply and just looks at me. That's it. Don't expect me to do something you can't!
"You know what, let's both bring our kids tonight or next Sunday," she smiles and looks around. In such a short time, Natasha changed. She's got something different in her.

I really want to attend the evening service, I really do, but right now I can barely move.
"Ellie?" I look up at Natasha that takes a seat next to me. My body is shaking and I feel frustrated. "Geez, I wish I knew what to do."
"I spend the whole day thinking about church and this is what happens to me," I say and try to take the glass from her. God probably decided to keep my mind busy so that I ended up missing out on my addiction. There are consequences for everything and this is me paying for my deeds. "I forgot to buy them. Steven threw them out. Dumb idiot. Look where he's at now. Not even here."
"I'll see if I can call Tammy," she says and takes her phone out of her pocket. "Maybe she can get a pastor here."
"No," I cry and grab her hand. "Please don't."

I get it. Natasha cares a lot. Maybe more about me than anybody ever did. She did what she felt was the right thing to do. I sit in the quiet room with a few other people. I'm finally submitted into rehab. Maybe it's for the best. Like Tammy says, God makes no mistake. It's just a matter of time and patience. As for me, I have time, but no such thing as patience. So God, please give me patience, but now because I'm not fit to wait.
"So how do you feel about the church?" Tammy asks walking with me up to the building. My session starts within about fifteen minutes again. Luckily it's not like in the movies. It's more like a support group than a prison.
"Great. It's very different," I reply and fold my arms looking around. "I just hope this thing can pass by quickly. I'm sick and tired of this."
"My dad had a terrible drinking problem. Everyone prayed for him and hoped for him to change, but he didn't. When I began attending this church, I knew there was more in life than prayer. Yes, pray, but what about faith? It's easy to pray, but praying in faith is a whole different level of Christianity," Tammy tells me. I get it, okay? Everyone has struggles. "I know you will be freed, Eleanor. I've seen it happen before, I will see it a million more times. The God we serve is the same God that rose from the grave."
"Why me, though? I'm not that important. I'm very messed up," I laugh and stop in front of the building looking at her. "Why would God help a drug addict but not a homeless person that needs him more?"
"God doesn't need you, but he wants you," she says and smiles at me. "You have a choice. Everybody has a choice, but the one you make on earth will determine where you spend eternity."
"Christians are confusing," I say to her and inhale deeply. "Thank you for checking in on me, Tammy. I appreciate it."
"Eleanor, can I pray for you before you go in?" she asks. I nod my head slowly and turn to her. She takes my hand and bows her head. I bow my head as well and close my eyes. "Our heavenly Father, today we come in the name of Christ Jesus, our Lord, and savior and we ask forgiveness for our sins. Help us forgive those who sinned against us. We ask that you take Eleanor's hand through this. God. I know you will break every chain that holds her back from the future you have laid out for her. Thank you for bringing her to this day. Thank you for freeing her and giving her a second chance. We pray this in Jesus' name. Amen."
I let go of her hands and look at her. She smiles at me and turns around walking away. If her dad's alcohol addiction got broken through faith, I know mine will break as well. It's a sudden assurance I have. Honestly, I don't know how to explain this but I have hope that this addiction will get broken. It will kill me if I don't kill it. But what will I do once it's broken?