Whatever the Price

Chapter 13: A Spoon Falls

Once Upon A Dream — Lana Del Rey

They hadn't noticed how heavily the rain had been falling as they'd teleported to the bottom of the mortuary's wet steps, only finding out as the bottom of Lilith's stiletto slid down the sodden stoop and nearly had her on her knees. Zelda caught her quickly by the elbow and looked at her, puzzled as to what had happened.

Lowering her down onto the bottom step, she had a look at her wife's shin and examined it for any visible injuries. Turning and looking up at Lilith, she couldn't see her face as it was covered by a curtain of chocolate curls.

"What in Hecate's name are you doi-?" she began, unable to finish as she noticed Lilith's eyes screwing shut, mouth curling into a wide smile with silent laughter falling from her lips.

Looking at her amused face, she chuckled. Lilith puffed out a breath of air that made an obnoxious snorting sound, sending Zelda into a fit of giggles.

"I slip- I slipped..." Was all Lilith could force out, breath coming in gasps.

"Honestly Lilith, after what you've confessed today you need to be more careful, don't you think?" Zelda quipped, suddenly reminded of Lilith's injuries. Her eyes darted straight to her left arm and leg.

With still watering eyes, the demoness looked at her wife affectionately, tilting her head. Gladly, Zelda had taken the news well. Although it was probably Maman Brigittte who could take the credit for that, Marie as well perhaps. The two of them had been scheming the whole time, not giving Maman and Lilith a crumb of a hint as to what they were planning.

Lilith had tried to hide her condition long enough and was relieved it was out now, thanks to the help of her confidant and their weekly "brunches". Building up the courage to let Zelda in and tell her of the numerous rituals she's put herself through, leading to the stroke, had been a slow process.

The ritual with Medea and its effects on her health as well as Abbadon's involvement had made Zelda all the more furious, but she was quite touched learning about how Brigitte had found and helped her heal.

"Just so you know, I haven't told you this so you can fuss over me. This is me trying to be better, more honest." She rested her hand gently on her wife's knee, while the redhead just looked at her arm sulkily.

"I know..." she exhaled a long breath, then muttered, "Just wish I would've been there... Told you not to do it!"

She rose from the stoop and paced before turning to the demoness once more.

"You need to tell me what you need, Lilith, and not hide things from me. I'm serious."

The demoness responded with a warm smile first, then added earnestly, "Yes, that's what we're working on. You've got your control-thing going, I've got my secrecy..."

Lilith tilted her head, trying to meet her wife's eye and to reassure her with her words, wanting to keep this happy mood going, just a little longer. But Zelda seemed lost in her own world.

"I need you to understand that I made those decisions and so I have to deal with the consequences. Can you accept that?"

Accept that her wife had pushed her body and psyche to extremes, all in the name of becoming a better wife for her? That was what her mind was telling her – but long hours of discussions with Maman Brigitte had taught her that despite what she was thinking, she wasn't to blame for every single bad thing happening.

Lilith was voicing her needs right now, without feeling urged to tread on eggshells, so she should listen. Maman wasn't here to refer, neither were they speaking through thoughtful letters as they usually did these days when there were difficult subjects to discuss. This was real, this was reality. Her behaviour right now would determine what progress they had actually made and where they were standing in their relationship.