BTS Eighth Member | The Life: Year 2013

Chapter 12- N.O. Comeback

!DISCLAIMER - Mentions of suicide and overdose!

!Important Author's Note at the End!

September 12th, 2013:

We had our first performance of NO on Mcountdown in the morning and we had been practicing the dance studio all night which meant I hadn't been able to bake Namjoon a cake like I had Jungkook. I felt terrible about it, but there was nothing I could do. Of course, I told him I would've baked him one and I would make it up to him. In return, Namjoon said he understood, and I didn't have to worry about it.

Another thing I felt terrible about was that my period started yesterday, and the second day was always the worst. I had enough tampons and pads, but the pain was so strong no matter how many ibuprofens I took it still hurt. I had kept my promise to the boys and let them know my period was making me feel a little under the weather, but I didn't tell them the extinct of my pain.

It was 6am and we were taking our first break after a few hours of practice and that was when Bang PDnim decided to walk in.

"I hope you guys were practicing a second ago," he states walking in and looking at all of us sitting in front of the foggy mirror

We all rush to our feet and stand respectively in a line in front of him.

"Of course. We were just taking a quick break," says Namjoon hurriedly.

"Good, I'd hate to see you guys slacking off," replies PDnim, "are you ready for the performance today?"

"Yes, we've practiced very hard and will work even harder to make the company proud," answers Namjoon.

"Good. The fans seem to like the music video, no major comments on Y/N yet. I think you did a good job of mirroring the boys and having a more subtle femininity this time, the fans seem to start seeing your place in the group more. Your weight loss is also definitely helping," says Bang PDnim to me.

"Thank you. I will work to continue to be better and fit within the group," I reply smiling and bowing.

This was huge for me, no major nasty comments, and Bang PD was happy, maybe the future wasn't so dark after all.

"Well, I look forward to seeing you perform today. I will be cheering you on, don't let me down," he finishes, giving us a small smile and two fists to give us strength, "maybe if you do well, I'll take you all out to dinner. I'm sure you would like that Jin," he says walking out and winking at Jin.

"Well now we have to do well," jokes Seokjin turning to us.

"Free food is always a great motivator," I chuckle.

"God I would love food right now," I think holding my stomach as another cramp hit and my stomach gurgled hungrily for food.

I hadn't eaten anything the past 3 days, other than water, to look extra skinny and good for the performance and it was taking a toll, especially when compounded with the fact we slept maybe 5 hours the past 3 days and my period.