Unwritten Endings [Daniel Ricciardo]

Monaco

Disappointment. If that was even enough to say about Daniel's results. I didn't blame him, but I surely knew that that was exactly what he did after once he saw the checkered flag. 

While I could listen to his radio that he shared with his engineer, I stayed in the garage while most of the team was either shouting in happiness, or on their way to the finishing line, while the rest of us stood like dumb-fools, neither of us understanding how this weekend, the one Daniel surely looked forward to, could end up with him even being lapped by Lando. It didn't get much better knowing that he also was outside the points, making today's result feel even more sour. 

Lando, who managed to get on the podium after Charles Leclerc's car failing with the gearbox just before the race would start, and Valtteri Bottas' bad pit stop, that ended up with him retiring the car, gave me a bittersweet feeling on how I both was happy for McLaren for getting onto the podium for the second time this season, but I was still devastated for Daniel, listening to his short words on the radio once he got to the finish line as he congratulated the team and Lando. 

Sharing a look with Michael who heard the exact same words, we nodded at each other as if we both understood how the rest of the day would be like. 

And I didn't feel like staying here, knowing that Daniel wouldn't really be in a great mood, and it would be even harder on him if both me and Charlotte would be here. Not that he probably would care if I would see his face whenever he would take off his helmet, but I knew that he didn't want to show it to Charlotte. 

Charlotte must've understood it as well, as she excused herself, to go watch the celebrations on the podium while I joined Michael and Blake, grateful that it was at least us three that would meet up with Daniel after he'd jumped out of the car, doing the usual control to see that he was in the weight rate. 

As us three walked over to where all the drivers would come out, I placed my hands on the backs of the two men walking next to me. "It will get better, okay?" 

Both of them looking at me, nodding, even though neither of us knew if this bad spell Daniel seemed to have over him would ever disappear. And the worst part of all of this, was that the season had barely started, with 17 races left on the calendar. But as long as we kept on pushing Daniel to see the hopes for every weekend to only get better from this moment, he would hopefully trust us in the going. 

But my heart broke when I saw him walk out from the door, his head hanging low while he kept his helmet on. I stayed in the background for a moment as he removed it, sharing a look with Michael before he shook his head, gratefully taking the towel from Michaels hands before taking a sip of the water bottle before he looked over Blake's shoulder, getting eye contact with me. 

And in that moment, I felt hope. Especially as I for the first time saw his lips curl up into an honest smile for once after these days. Maybe, just maybe, my small surprise for him last night, where I had placed all the pillows I owned on the floor in front of my tv, with lights all around my apartment while I had found a movie I knew he liked helped. It surely helped a bit last night as he had come knocking on my door after barely speaking with anyone after his quali. 

But I knew when he looked at me with grateful eyes to know that I was still there, still there waiting for him even though I knew that he could be in the worst mood ever, that his sudden mood-swings from the weekend was simply because he was frustrated with himself. And not with us. 

One step. Two steps. That was all it took before his heavy, sweaty body fell into my arms. I didn't blame him though, not seeing any good progress of his own race while being seated in the car for more than one and a half hour, I would fall into my arms as heavy as him too. With his arms curling around my shoulders, I gave him a tight squeeze. I knew that I wanted to to everything to let him understand that we were many, not only in the paddock but also all over the world, that felt the anger with him, that would support him for every time he would sit down in that car no matter what results he would bring in.