High School Life In India

Nothing To Talk About

I would have many things to talk about with my friends if i were to go out of my house, roam my neighborhood and was allowed out, which i am not and all these things in my life point towards nothing but Money...

I really want to go out, i want to make money and i want to do a job, and live like how all the other students in my class feel so free to do whatever they want, their parents allow them to go out of house, they can go alone to their friend's house, their parents won't follow behind them all the time like a stalker....

*SIGH*

Have you ever heard of a word known as Overprotectiveness??
I have not heard it but i have been living with it for God knows how long...

It's nothing but paranoia of my parents if i say so...

So, some students came to us and asked as if we want to come to a lounge for a farewell party...i know, i know... farewell is far away, but still... it's like i don't have the word yes in my dictionary...so ofcourse i declined.

Then my close friends who think  lounge is too much for us said that they should do their own little party in a cafe or something...then ofcourse being their friend i was invited too...but they don't seem to understand that i am not allowed to go...and for me to go alone? It's hard... really really hard.

People ask me that are your parents strict? Oh no! They are not, they are not strict, they are something else entirely...

They think i joke about my condition....it is not a joke, and me telling that i will not marry anyone in my whole life is also a serious talk for me which i won't tell you now...they think that it's just a fleeting thing i said in the heat of the moment but it's not...

They (my friends) go on vacation with thier family and they do so every single year...i say they are Lucky to be born in such an environment and ofcourse i am too, but for me it's just a bit different.

Sometimes they talk about such things like " oh i will be going there",  " i will go there next week" "i will eat this and that" "wear this and that".....
I feel so ignored....
I feel that i can't mingle in and that's because i Don't have a story about that specific topic to tell... because! I don't go out...when they say that " you haven't seen that place?" With so much surprise on their faces, i feel like shit...

That's also a reason i sometimes find them immature, asking what should not be asked if you know the answer is just childish...

If i were to tell my sob story then it will take an eternity for them to understand what i just said.... that's also a reason i find myself older than them in age despite being just 1 year older than them...that 1 year gap feel too big..

I am someone who like to read...like to write...like to paint...like to sing...i like spicy food and i definitely hate peas!( They are too sweet for my taste in a spicy dish)

After looking at the thing written above it only looks like i just put all my frustrations out...but that's just a little part of my life, a part which made me, me. The one who I am today...i have yet not achieved something in life but still...it's me and i am alive in my words which feels so nice...

You all should also start writing diaries or something, it's a good way to release all the bottled up frustrations in you.

Moving on....

I don't have a common topic to talk about with them that's most of the reason i stay quiet when they talk about such stuff...i guess they won't even notice me until or unless i say something...i guess that's also a reason for me to like plants and trees so much, you know, they don't talk.

And i know there are many people who feel like me and can relate....i hope to find such beings..i want to know what our kind of talk will be like?..

I guess that's a job for another day..