𝐭𝐫𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐦𝐞, Regulus Black

eighteen

[ he's my achilles' heel ]

• • •

Even though Christmas was slowly approaching, Velda wasn't in a good mood at all. The past few weeks had been painted with stress and drama, which was far too much for her to handle and her only way out seemed to be Quidditch. 

There, high up in the air, the cold winter breezes whirling around her body and hair, she felt freedom. She felt as light as a feather as she flew around the pitch, no goal, simply flying. It was fair to say that Velda felt hurt by Meadow's and Regulus' actions. As she saw them together it felt like fourth year all over again. 

Sometimes she wished that Regulus could see how much he had fucked her up. For a few weeks after the incident in the dungeons, she hadn't really talked to anyone, distanced herself from her only friends because she was scared that they would turn their backs on her too. She was scared that they'd break their trust just like he did.

After a while she slowly adjusted to them again but only because Ada made her. For some reason the Hufflepuff knew that something was off and Velda was convinced that she knew exactly what it was, Ada always had a way of knowing things she shouldn't. Velda never told the others about her 'friendship' with Regulus, they never knew why both of them hated each other all of the sudden but with time it became such normality that they never cared to ask. 

Regulus had been like a whole different person, as if he dropped a mask that had hidden his usual, cruel character before and it hurt her more than it should. Knowing that it really all had been fake, she couldn't even tell what of the things he had told her had been the truth. Did he really liked house elves or did he treated them like slaves? Did he really admired his brother or did he just tell her to gain her trust? Had anything he told her been the truth, or was it all a lie? 

This overwhelming feeling of weakness and pain caused her to fall into a deep, dark hole which took years for her to crawl out of. She brushed all of his cruel comments, he threw at her head, off and hurled another back at him like it meant nothing to her. 

Comment by comment, hit by hit but deep down it hurt and she hated it. He was her own Achilles' heel; she was a strong person, she always had been but he was her weakness, her vulnerability, the reason for her downfall. 

But she was better now, she had calmed the scaring storm in her mind and had slowly became herself again. Every then and now her walls would crumble but she told herself it was alright, that it was okay to not be okay sometimes. 

Even though the scars had stayed, not just on her body but also on her mind. They'd never go away but they were healing. She supposed she loved her scars in some twisted way. They had stayed longer than most people did and held their tragedy tight. Still, she had never attempted to make new friends again. 

But when she saw Meadow and Regulus that day she felt like they had been ripped open once again. At first she was angry at both of them but all of the sudden she felt the intense need to protect Meadow from him. She was scared that her friend would end the same way she did and she didn't deserve it. She had never told Meadow that they had been friends. It might have been wrong of her to 'befriend' a person her best friend hated but Velda knew that this wouldn't be the end of their friendship. Meadow didn't knew what she was getting herself into and even if she did, the Hufflepuff always saw best in everyone. At some point they'd talk about it and forgive, never forget but forgive.

But Velda wasn't ready for that conversation yet. She had so many questions, why were they friends? Why him? How did they meet? And why the fuck could they transform into animals? Sure, she knew what an Animagus was, how could she not? Her Transfiguration Professor could transform into a cat. But why would they be one? She couldn't phantom that they'd be legal. 

Was that what Ada meant when she told Meadow to keep an eye on her cat? 

Did Ada knew all along? 

Why didn't she tell her or did she? Ada had a thing for making people guess what she's saying, which reminded Velda of Dumbledore, even though Ada didn't do it because she liked to let people guess but simply because she thought the look on their faces was funny enough to entertain her. 

When the sky was slowly turning dark, Velda decided that she had been on the Quidditch pitch long enough to clear her mind and walked back up to the castle. 

On her way back up to the Ravenclaw tower Sirius Black and James Potter rushed past her, followed by Filch and his cat. This was such a usual sight that she wasn't even surprised anymore. She simply made enough room for them to pass and continued her way. The only difference was that she asked herself whether Sirius was still in contact with his brother, the last information she got from Regulus was that the arguments between him and his mother got more heated and that he was thinking of running away. But she wasn't even sure if that was actually what had happened. By all means, Sirius could've been best friends with his mother for all she knew. She didn't trusted a single word Regulus had ever said to her. 

Velda reached the eagle with a sigh, why couldn't be entering her common room be as easy as the Gryffindor common room? Sometimes first year Ravenvlaws would sleep in front of the common room at night because they couldn't answer the riddle and no one was in the common room to hear them knock. 

She had been one of the first years once.

"You can have me but cannot hold me. Gain me and quickly lose me. If treated with care I can be great, and if betrayed I will break. What am I?"

Velda rolled her eyes at the irony, "Trust." 

She noticed Asher lying on the couch in front of the fire, lazily skipping the pages of a book, "What's up Vel?"  

Sitting down next to him, she leaned her head back and asked, "How did you know it was me?" 

"Sister dearest has been rubbing off me." 

Velda simply raised a brow at his statement and he let out a sigh, "Just kidding. In the past few days you've been screaming don't-talk-to-me-I-hate-everyone-vibes, why did you think that first year started to cry after you asked him for the time?" 

Rolling her eyes, she placed her feet onto his lap, "He must've gotten something in his eye, I'm not that scary." 

Ash gave her a sceptical look, "Yeah, no. You are very scary. And I'm even too scared to ask what happened between Meadow and you but my curiosity got the better of me." 

"Just a small misunderstanding." 

He nodded his head and answered with sarcasm, "Yeah, sure because I'll believe you that." 

Tilting her head, Velda stared at him for a moment. Regulus had ruined nearly any ability to trust a person again but she was sick of him and the effect he had on her. So why not give it a try? 

And so she told Ash everything.