Empty Gold

Chapter 19: The Lonely

"Ali?"

The younger blonde pauses mid scrubbing as she looks over to see Cece emerge from the hallway of her spacious apartment. Cece's voice is soft, and the agent knows that Alison is trying to assimilate but she can't help but feel strangely about the younger blonde spending her free time cleaning the apartment. Alison manages a weak smile and looks sheepishly at Cece, knowing already what the older blonde is going to say. Cece's been tiptoeing around her for too long now. The agent smiles before her phone buzzes in her hand and her brows furrow as she concentrates on the screen.

"We gotta find stuff for you to do that isn't slaving away in the kitchen," Cece sighs absentmindedly as she goes to the kitchen island and leans with her elbows on it, her eyes never leaving her phone as she continues to focus on it. "No pun intended."

"I don't mind," Alison quickly replies, not wanting to antagonize Cece's obvious stress. She feels like a big enough burden just by existing in this space, she'd rather not have her actions add to the problem. "I like cleaning."

"How can you like cleaning?!" Cece jokingly groans as she shuts her phone off and throws her head back. Alison wonders what it is that's been eating away at the agent lately. Because, something definitely has. "It's the worst."

"I'm good at it," Alison tells Cece softly as she continues to scrub the grease from the stove. The agent raises an eyebrow as she watches Ali's thin arms flex furiously scrubbing to remove the tough spots. "My thoughts...they're quieter... when I clean."

Cece manages a small smile at Alison's peculiar way of phrasing things, she understands—Emily swims away her pain similarly to the way Alison takes to cleaning. It's not healthy but it's a coping mechanism they've both succumbed to.

"Well, you've got all this free time here, what about doing some school work? We could get you reading some books—"

"I have books," Alison stops her cleaning as a sad frown drops along her lips. "Th-they're back at Emily's."

Her mind wanders to the day at the store when Emily bought her those night lights, and all those books— but now her memories are different. Now she knows that Emily did those things with no underlying intentions of forcing her to have sex. That Emily did them because she genuinely wanted Ali to be happy. She plays through that moment on the bench with Emily, reading Beauty and the Beast, and—

"Hey, don't cry," Cece coos softly as she slips around the counter to the younger blonde who didn't even realize she was tearing up. The agent gently removes the sponge from her hand and tosses it carelessly in the sink with a gentle smirk. She rubs a hand soothingly up Ali's arm softly and with great care not to scare Ali. When Alison wipes at her eyes trying to appear unaffected, Cece gives her a warm smile. The agent takes a deep breath before bringing up the concerns she's had all along. "Ali do you...do you want to see a therapist? You know...to talk about...what happened?"

"A therapist?" Ali's voice squeaks as she clarifies, her blue eyes shimmering with confusion. When Cece nods, Ali looks horribly ashamed. "I-I don't t-think a therapist would talk to me."

"I bet I could find one," Cece explains gently. "A good one. Someone that deals primarily with trauma from rape—"

Alison's face pales and Cece instantly slows down, carefully considering her next words.

"I just...I just want to make sure you're... eventually okay, physically and emotionally," Cece offers a sad smile as Alison nods and steps forward to hug Cece tightly, catching the agent off guard. The older blonde rubs Ali's back gently, always grateful for the moments where the younger blonde shows unguarded affection, because it means Ali is finally starting to feel safe.