Things Agents of Shield are Not Allowed to Do

58-64

58 Being told you are more annoying than Tony Stark isn't meant as a compliment even if you take it as one.

59 Hydra are not to blame for you throwing your vegetables at Coulson.

60 Nick Fury does not find it amusing when you call him "Nicky" or "Furious Fury".

61 Whining "Skye stole my candy" when they are more pressing matters such as 50 Hydra agents trying to kill you will make people want to hurt you.

62 May will ban you from watching anything with Zombies in if you start handing out leaflets on what do when the Zombies rise.

- She will know that you watched a Zombie movie even though she banned you from doing so.

- Because Coulson will tell her

- Because he's mean

- He's not mean he's awesome again once he buys you an ice cream and killed a bad guy for you.

63 You will be asked to explain why you are wearing a Loki mask.

64 The best way to convince Hydra agents that you're not shield agents when you are out in the open among civilians is to do something so ridiculously stupid they'll think shield would never work with an idiot like that.