The Gangster Who Hates Me (BoyxBoy)

CHAPTER 17: LIES

Jude's POV

Things have gotten out of hand recently, but it was also oddly strange and bizarre, especially what had happened twenty minutes ago.

I decided to walk home. I was running out of allowance already and a taxi or an uber drive is quite expensive. The bus stop however is far from the highway and still, I need to save my little amount of money left for this month. I will just rely on the school bus for the weeks to come as a means of transportation which I take advantage oftentimes.

The night was not really that deep. In fact, it's still so early; 8:30 p.m.

I wasn't done yet with my research requirements to be passed this week because Sky shooed me home. I was not expecting he will send me home though. As we all know, he's not a gentleman. He's evil and so bad. He should have sent me home. If ever something bad happens to me on the way, he should be the one to  be blamed. Really.

Looking at my arms, I gaze on the bandages wrapped into it, bringing me to a pit of realization that he somehow has a very small space of goodness in his heart. Up until now, It was all still surreal and absurd of what Sky had done. Saving me from those bullies in the parking lot, letting me go to his house, letting me borrow his laptop and shirt, and treating my wounds.

All in all, still unbelievable. Why is it that my number one hater suddenly does things out of his usual thing to do?

Again, as much as I want to really see the goodness in him, it still didn't cover up the wounds he inculcated in my heart many years had passed and still counting.

Snapping out from my thoughts, I caressed my hands against my biceps as the cold breeze touches my bare skin. I was not on my long sleeve anymore because it was full of blood stains and dirt. I already wore a big black t-shirt Sky gave me. I have decided to just throw it away once I got home.

Speaking of, a slight feeling of joy overwhelmed me when my house was finally in view. It was such a long walk, but I took it in a positive way as a form of exercise.

I can't wait to feel my bed. It's old and not comfy unlike Mitch's but I still love mine. My bed was my comforter and my safe haven all my life. My inner self also yearns for that substance that I hid in my mini drawer, along with my medications.

I just want to forget this night, this whole day in general. A lot had happened which exhausted and hurt me so much and I need a getaway. I want to get lost far away from the reality even just for tonight, again. I can't think of any options but to be tempted to use the synthetic drugs that I have spared which I realized that I always did use these past months. My addiction to those drugs was like a therapy, which is in fact true.

The neighborhood was somehow peaceful and serene. However, the occasional sound of crickets and frogs can be heard around the area. I am so oblivious if they are just near, far or wherever. 

Tiny pebbles created a low sound as it collided on my black school shoes. I walked fast, curiosity bubbles up in me when I saw our house was bright with yellow lights inside.

Familiar voices enveloped my eardrums the moment I stepped onto the two mini stairs leading to the entrance of our house.

The familiar voices belonged to my parents and Mitch. I forgot that it's monday and today just also means my parents would be back from their trip.

Unknowing what to feel, I halted on my track and listen to their lively chatters that wafted through the air. They have such a happy conversation, catching up with each other.

"Mom, I just have a lot of things to tell you really! I'm so excited to tell it all to you. Do you mind sleeping to my room tonight?" Mitch vigorously said.

"Your mom is still tired from the travel sweetheart. Why don't—," Dad said but was cut off by mom.

"Honey, it's okay..." Mom interrupted as she assured dad. "I don't mind at all sweetheart. I miss you too so much, so maybe we can have our girls night in your bed tonight," she continued, now talking to Mitch. They are really close.

"That's great mom! I really have a lot of things to talk to you about,"

Basing on the sound of cutleries, they currently have their dinner. I carefully put my black shoulder bag with a laptop of Sky's in it and some random school supplies onto the floor. I tiredly slid my back on the wall as I sat down on the wooden floor beside the main door of the house which is closed. I should be happy that they are already home, but why is it that I am not?

Typically, I always get happy when my parents go home from their trips even though they are not really that happy to see me. However, I am not in the mood today. I just feel so gloomy, tired, drained and emotional from everything that had happened this day.

I listened to their endless but happy conversation without me being included or mentioned for the past couple of minutes now. It's like my existence didn't matter to them at all, they are not even looking at me. When would I get used to it anyway?

"Where is Jude by the way?" Dad asked moments later, and I got interested with their conversation all of a sudden.

I knelt on my knees and listen closely with their conversation as I stuck my right ear against the wall.

"I don't know dad. You know what mom, dad? When you two were out of your trip, that faggot often came home very late. As in super late. He didn't even go to school sometimes. I don't know what he was up to but my friends saw him in a gay bar for three consecutive nights and I think he's in that place right now. Agh! That faggot is unbelievable! Such a disgrace in this family!"

"Wait, what?! Are you sure sweetheart?" Mom asked.

No mom, she's lying.

"Mom? Why would I lie to you? You know what also? He even hosted a party last friday night here in our house. Damn it! The house was so messy and your vase even broke. He just replaced it with an identical one. Look mom, I have pictures of him at the party. He's so wild and gross,"

Anger immediately arouse in me. I can't believe Mitch is destroying my image to my parents behind my back. I want to go in there and tell them right away that Mitch was lying, but my feet are glued on the floor. I was so helpless.

"Oh my God. I can't believe this. Look at this honey..." Mom's getting mad and it makes me scared. "He was such a burden in our lives all these years already and now, that's what he just did to us?"

Tears hastily welled up in my eyes, heart was crushed. Why did Mitch tell those lies? 

Deeply hurt and petrified, I held my chest with my hand as I pinched my flesh through my shirt to somehow ease the pain I was feeling inside.

So I'm just a burden to this family?

Why was I even questioning it? It's true, I'm such a burden.

What mom had said brought such a heavy pang in my heart. It constricted in a way that my breathing was gone difficult. Tears started to cascade down from my eyes as I covered my mouth to stop my whimper to come out.

"Damn that faggot. He is such a plague  and a disgrace in this family. I regret we adopted him in our family," Dad said that had completely lost me.

I could not be able to decipher their next conversation anymore, as I lost my sense of hearing because of what I just heard.

My body was furiously shaking, trying my best not to faint out.

Shocked, devastated, wrecked, anger and mixed with negative emotions; that were feelings that dominate inside of me as of the moment and one thing came up into my mind.

I wanna be gone...