25.1. What Remains Human - Part 1

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"Sorry, I have to take it," I stand up, suddenly pale. I was wondering if she's going to call again. I've set my account to send her money every week for groceries, hoping she'd be content with that and leave me alone.

"Everything okay, Aefener?" Emi is worried.

"Y-yeah... it's just my grandma," I say.

"If it's okay than why is your heart racing?" Emi narrows her eyes and touches her vulpine ears. "Super hearing as well, remember?"

"We're not... exactly getting on well," I say quickly and rush towards to door. If I kept her waiting for too long, she'd be twice as furious. Liana and Emi are looking at me with concern. I smile at them faintly, assuring them that I'm okay before I disappear from their sight. Erik follows me, of course.

We get into an empty briefing room next to Liana's office, Erik closes the door and I can finally pick it up.

"Ryuuto, dear," she starts unbelievably sweet which is even scarier than her usual shouting.

"H-hello," I greet her cautiously. She's much more unpredictable in her mania periods.

I'm surprised that she turns on her phone's camera. She's wearing a nice dress that looks quite expensive and light make-up. When she makes an effort, I can see the resemblance to my Mom in her but it only makes me even more anxious when dealing with her. She's nothing like my kind Mom.

"So I've just had an interview... another one," she says cheerfully.

"An interview?" I blink.

"This time for this online media press... I forgot the name, there're so many recently," she continues. "They're so courteous, not like the EU. It was more like an interrogation than a conversation when they came to ask about you."

My heart starts beating even faster. Liana actually expected the EU would try to contact my grandma to ask about me but gran doesn't know about my telepathy, nor has any idea what my Mom was doing in Japan, so we decided to do nothing about it.

"They weren't forceful or anything, were they?" I ask. I can't help being worried about her safety. We might not have the best relationship but she's still my only family.

"Oh, no, just pushy," she shrugs. "Ryuuto, dear, why don't you switch on your camera as well?"

"Are you sure you want to see me? Last time you called me..."

"I was in shock, that's all," she waves her hand. A bit too theatrically. "I've digested it already so let me see my grandson's face."

I look at Erik. He shrugs, also not sure what her intentions might be. I reluctantly switch on my phone's camera and make sure it doesn't show my boyfriend. Better keep him out of this.

"Oh," grandma freezes for a moment. Her lips curve, I can tell she's disgusted by my appearance. Celestials are closest to humans in body shape but we still look pretty alien. I think it's especially our golden eyes that unnerve humans the most.

"Well, look at you," she clenches her teeth, trying hard to play amicable.

"What do you want, gran?" I breathe in deeply. She never calls just like that.

"Are you coming home anytime soon? I need to fix a few things," she says as if she doesn't get what kind of situations the world is in right now. And especially me.

"Are you serious?!" I can't believe my ears. Did she lose it after all? Maybe she stopped taking her medicine again.

She looks sideways for some reason before continuing.

"Look, I know that our relationship isn't the greatest but..."

Erik can't take it anymore and steps into the camera's frame.

"Who's with you?" he blurts at her which confuses me. What is he talking about?

"Oh, you're Ryuuto's friend, right?" grandma coughs nervously. "You're all over the media as well."

"I'm not just a friend, I'm his boyfriend and you know it," he clicks his tongue. "You're not alone, are you, Mrs Rehak? Who makes you say these things?"

Grandma grimaces and abruptly ends the phone call.

"Y-you think she wasn't alone?" I gasp for breath.

"Obviously, Ryuu," he rolls his eyes. "You're too benevolent when it comes to her, excusing everything because of her bipolarity. I think either the EU or some media company is trying to lure you out of Liana's skyscraper."

"B-but if that's true, isn't she in danger?" I worry.

"Gosh, Ryuu, how kind are you?" Erik performs an exemplary facepalm. "Did she look in danger? It seems to me that she's getting paid handsomely for those interviews. Stop sending her money, silly. You owe her nothing for all those years of neglect."

I don't say anything to that and just lower my head.

"You know...," Erik says extremely slowly. "When that psychologist arrives, maybe you should go see him. To resolve your... ehm..."

"Low self-esteem?" I finish the sentence and sigh because I know perfectly well what he's hinting at. "I know. Maybe I should."

"Oh, Ryuu," he hugs me. "I get it that you lack confidence after growing up with such a hag but we have to finally start working on it, okay? We can't have an Emperor who doesn't believe in himself."

I kiss him to deepen our connection and try to see myself through his eyes. He could always boost my confidence, at least temporarily. I know that I shouldn't depend on him that much. I realise it painfully well. Erik's right, I should seriously go see that psychologist when he gets here. I think I might gradually open up to him if he's a Draconian.

But that's for the future. Right now, I'm not able to do any of these things so I delve into the mind of my loved one to find refuge once again. Am I addicted to him because of my telepathy or because of my insecurities? Hopefully, I can work on my insecurities but if the telepathic craving is natural to my mutated brain... what will I do when Erik gets tired of me?

"What do you mean 'when'?" Erik pinches the soft skin under my feathers because he gets annoyed with what I was thinking right now. "Even if you rephrased it with IF, I would be offended."

"Ouch," I whine. "Pinching a Celestial under feathers, that's nasty, you!"

"Well, you kind of deserved it," he caressed my feathers, tenderly now. "You were thinking something funny again."

"Because my telepathy might..."

He doesn't give me a chance to finish that sentence, though. He silences me with a kiss and doesn't let go easily. He tries to patch my sadness with his love and it seems to be working. His mind is so stable, unlike mine. I can lean into him and trust that he will hold me.

"I love you," I whisper between kisses.

I know that he can feel it from me but I promised myself during my transformation that I won't be afraid to say it aloud. My first step to complete openness. I'm willing to work on myself. For me and for him.

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