Draconia Offline vol. 1

48.2. In Between - Part 2

"What about this shirt?" I hand Erik a leisure blue shirt he likes wearing in our apartment.

"Too casual," he shakes his head and it seems he can't decide between two suits.

"Erik, you're meeting your friends, not going for a business negotiation," I tell him. "Your friends won't appreciate a three-piece suit."

"Hon, I don't look gorgeous even with my bed-hair," he retorts which takes me aback. "Unlike you, I need to make an effort."

"You do look gorgeous with your bed-hair," I murmur, hurt by his reaction.

I don't know why but something in me stings a little and suddenly I feel my eyes watering. We did have some arguments in the past about much more serious topics than this nonsense. But for some reason it's such a nonsense that makes me extremely sad.

"Love, what's wrong?" Erik finally stops browsing his wardrobe and gives me his full attention. "Are you... crying?"

Alarmed, he goes for his default—a hug. That never changes and I always find comfort in it. I grab him tight and he keeps apologising to me even if he doesn't exactly know what for. I'm also not sure what went over me just now. Did I feel insecure? Confused by his behaviour? Am I blaming him for turning into a vain person?

Erik openly enjoys the luxury. He likes wearing expensive suits, leather shoes and brand watches. His part of the wardrobe is stuffed at this point. When did he buy all those clothes and accessories? Admittedly, my part is overstuffed as well but I didn't buy anything myself. My maids did. I don't care much about what I'm wearing as long as it's comfortable and warm. But Erik does.

Naturally, I want to provide my partner with abundance. I want him to be happy. I want him to enjoy that we finally have money. But I don't want him to become vain and conceited. I have enough problems with my prideful subjects.

"Damn, you really think I'm turning that way?" he senses what I'm thinking about and chews his lip. "I guess... I needed that feedback."

I'm relieved that he understood me but I'm still shaken.

"Sorry for retorting at you," he apologises. "You meant well. You were thinking about my friends feeling comfortable in my presence. I'm afraid I am becoming rather vain. I mean... I was never poor but I never had serious money either. How come it didn't get into your head?"

"I'd rather spend my money on merch and videogames if I had time to actually enjoy it," I finally manage a smile and let Erik dry my tears into his sleeve.

"Once a geek, always a geek?" he smirks. "How cute, the mighty Celestial Emperor is secretly a geek."

"It's no secret, I just don't have time anymore," I say. "And I also want to apologise."

"What for?" he blinks. "It me who made you dry."

"For making light of your wish for more free time," I say. "We both need it. We have to unwind sometimes or we'll go crazy. I think the pressure is getting to us."

"So...?" he becomes hopeful.

"I'll ask Liana for Sundays off... every week," I promise.

After clearing the misunderstanding, we go back to dressing up. Erik doesn't go for a three-piece and chooses a casual smart suit instead.

"I would look tragically underdressed next to you if I wore just a shirt," he justifies his choice.

"Oh, I don't have any actual casual clothes," I realise.

When it comes to the robes I wear when we're spending time in our apartment, it's usually just a matter of dropping the upper embroidered layer.

"Maybe I could ask Ingri to design a hoodie and normal pants in Celestial style?" I'm thinking aloud. "I don't have any homely clothes after all."

"I can't imagine you in human clothes anymore, love, and you'd be cold anyway" Erik laughs. "Let's go, I don't want to keep them waiting."

I'm glad that we made up immediately but the bugging feeling stays within me. Recently, I started to notice things I either didn't notice before or choose to ignore. I notice how he narrows his eyes at every perspective Celestial man who just looks at me for too long and how ostentatiously he clutches my hand in public.

He's not nervous around Vermiel and Taranah only because he asked them openly some time ago whether they're gay and they assured him that they're straight. As for other races including humans, he doesn't mind. Does he suspect that I'm not attracted to human men anymore? Is that the source of his insecurity? That calls for another visit to the psychologist.

"Do your job properly!"

All of a sudden, Erik bursts at my guards because one Celestial managed to touch my wing when we're passing the usual crowd waiting for me in the corridors. And this thing. He's so over-protective.

"Erik, it's fine," I squeeze his hand more firmly. "She was just curious."

"Groping you isn't curiosity, Ryuu," he purses his lips.

"Hello, what's your name?" I turn back and face the person who touched me.

It's a young Celestial woman, not much older than Luviael. I don't want to be passing my people just because I'm always busy. I don't like it. I want to be closer to them. Get to know them.

The girl widens her eyes when she realises I'm actually talking to her. She starts stuttering something that might be her name but I don't quite catch that. Her wings are still small, only half my size. She must have been a low-level ingame.

"Do you like it here? Is your job okay?" I ask with concern.

"I'm honoured to be here, Your Majesty," she finally manages a reasonable reply.

"That's not the answer to my question," I sigh and gently take her hand. "It's fine, let them," I tell my guards because they try to get the people away from me.

Maybe I shouldn't have said that because the moment Celestials see their chance, they're all over me. But their presence doesn't evoke any bad feeling in me. They're my subjects, not humans who would want to hurt me.

"Are you looking forward to flying?" I try to make a conversation and let gracefully slide that the way they're touching my wings now that I permitted it does feel like groping.

"Of course, Your Majesty."

"I can't wait!"

"Your feathers are so soft! Much softer than mine!"

Unexpectedly, I feel someone touching me really inappropriately, a hand reaching under the robe between my wings. I let out a suffocated cry and everyone is thrown away from me by a telekinetic wave. I didn't do it, though. I'd never use my powers against my own people. My guards intervened.

"That's enough!" Miruel gets furious and my bodyguards form a protective circle around me again.

"Who was it?!" Erik is even angrier than her.

The crowd, realising they're in trouble, disperses.

"Dammit, that shouldn't have happened!" he clicks his tongue and hurries to me. "Ryuu, do you know who they were?"

"No, it was too sudden," I lie.

I didn't see their face but I'm sure I could recognise their emotional imprint if I faced them again. But I choose not to pursue it. I would with human offenders but not with Celestials. I'm sure they were just too eager to see me. Too mesmerised by my enormous mana leaking.

"No need to report it!" I prevent Miruel from taking out her phone. "I'm fine."

"Ryuu, it's not nothing," Erik hugs me. "Your wings are shaking."

"I'll be more careful next time," I promise. "I just thought... I simply wanted..."

"Connect to your people?" he finishes and feels extremely sad for me.

"I'm fine, really," I assure him. "Your friends are waiting, let's go."

He doesn't want to let it go easily but I catch his hand and pull him to move on. I'm sure I wasn't traumatised just now. I'm pretty sure. My wings are shaking but it's only a shock that something like this happened. It doesn't remind of those three times I was groped on the metro in the past. Right? Right! I'm fine!