aromantic. ~ b.e story

chapter twenty nine

BILLIE

i started pacing back n forth in the bathroom as
the alarm went off on my phone.

i'm guessing josh heard it too because now he's knocking at the door "billie? you good in there?" he asks.

"i'm fine, for now i guess." i say, me whispering the last part out.

i breathe, my hands shaky as i close my eyes and flip the tests.

i count to three in my head and....

pregnant.

i look down at the second test.

+

i look at the third...

I I

and the fourth...

another positive.

i didn't notice i was crying until i saw a tear drop onto the countertop, and i quickly dried my tears.

how was i gonna tell my mom i've been sleeping around in college instead of studying? she'll pull me out for that, for sure.
how was josh going to tell his mom?
how was i supposed to focus on myself and my schoolwork with a whole child in my body?
and most importantly.... the money this baby's gonna have me spend?

i wanted to get rid of it...but i had to tell everyone before i did it. and without telling either of our parents. and how to find a clinic in florida. after everything that just went down with the abortion laws and stuff...

it was all too much.

i opened the door, revealing josh. i guess he was just as nervous as i was because he was fidgeting with his fingers.

"is everything okay, why you crying mama?" he asks quietly as another tear just slides down my cheek.

i go back into the bathroom and show him one of the tests, and watched as he frowned.

"billie, are you sure you're ready for a baby?" he says lowly. i knew he was serious because he started calling me by my real name.

i just shake my head as josh pulls me into his embrace, me sobbing into his sweater.

"it'll be okay, and just know i support your decision, okay?" he says as i pull away from his sweater, him wiping my tears.

we then look as taurus busts into the room, all happy n shit.

"so am i gonna be an unc-" he said, cutting himself off as his smile dropped, seeing the expression on our faces.

"i'll see y'all later" he says in defeat, leaving and closing the door.

josh then kisses me, pulling me back into his embrace as i sobbed some more into his chest.

just fucking great.

TAURUS

i felt so stupid walking into they room like that. i had no idea none of em' wanted a baby, but i understand, i mean we still in college and shit already too tough to be having a baby on top of all that.

i'm texting nia about the whole situation making sure she knew until i heard a door open, it's josh.

"what's going on?" i ask, placing my phone down next to me.

"i dunno man, the tests came back positive and billie don't want the baby, and if i'm being serious with myself, imma respect billie's decision but i don't know how long this process gone take, we gotta find a clinic and all that before her stomach start growing n shit, then it'll be impossible to do at that point" josh explains to me as i shake my head in pity.