Invitations | MinSung

21

Jeongin sat by the window of the cafe, somewhere where he was guaranteed a good view of the area surrounding the university buildings. It was a bright, pleasant day out and there were masses of students; some clumped in big groups, talking, and others alone. He knew it wasn't that important of a job to keep an eye out for, but he still wanted to do his best. So, he sat there, sipping his hot chocolate as he kept an eye out for anything "suspicious". "Suspicious" was a bit of a broad subject but Jeongin tried his best, constantly looking over the campus. It was noisy in the cafe, but when Jeongin focused, he found that he could block out the unnecessary noise. However, what he couldn't block - or perhaps it was that he wouldn't - was a familiar voice calling his name.

"Jeongin?" Said the familiar voice and Jeongin looked up, knowing exactly who he would see there. As expected, he saw Hyunjin, smiling at him. Just his face was enough to make Jeongin feel a pang of guilt.

"What are you doing here?" Jeongin asked, instinctively.

"I should be asking you," Hyunjin responded in the same manner with a small giggle. Jeongin stayed quiet, lacking a good enough excuse. "How have you been?" Hyunjin asked, casually.

"I should be asking you," Jeongin replied, half-jokingly. The horrific guilt that he had sustained after hurting Hyunjin so seriously haunted him almost constantly. What was worse was that he had no way to rectify his actions; the damage had been done. "Are you OK, now?"

"Of course I am!" Hyunjin said, smiling even more to emphasise his point. However, when he noticed Jeongin's expression, he got a grasp of the situation and changed his tone. "What about you? Are you OK?"

Jeongin nodded, not offering a verbal response as he continued looking out of the window.

"Really?" Hyunjin asked for confirmation, to which Jeongin nodded once again. "Then what's with the long face?"

"What long face?" Jeongin immediately plastered a smile on his face and looked at Hyunjin. However, that smile dropped the second he went back to looking at the window.

"Is all this frowning to do with when I... when you- uh... pew pew?" Hyunjin struggled to think of a way to phrase the incident between him and Jeongin in a way that wouldn't weigh the atmosphere anymore. He ended up settling for sound effects, accompanied by a small hand gesture. "Or is it something else?"

Jeongin stayed quiet for a while before glancing at Hyunjin and muttering, "The first one."

"Don't be silly." Hyunjin leaned forward and ruffled Jeongin's already messy hair, causing the other the freeze and look at him with wide eyes. "I'm fine and, even though I doubt you'll believe me, it wasn't your fault."

"But it was!" Jeongin huffed.

"How so?" Hyunjin asked, putting Jeongin in an uncomfortable position. It had always been difficult for Jeongin to discuss how he was really feeling without getting choked with emotions or masking it with a smiley pretence. As a result, he hated it. Despite this, Jeongin owed Hyunjin this conversation and he would accept his fault, no matter what.

"Because, I was the one who- I- if only," Jeongin took a deep breath before continuing, "if only I hadn't tried to take matters into my own hands. If only I had stood back and let you and Jisung take care of it. If only I didn't act like a stupid child." He murmured in almost one breath. Although he tried to look Hyunjin in the eyes, he couldn't and ended up looking at the window once again. It was like an endless circle of avoided eye contact.

"Stupid child?" Hyunjin scoffed, clearly finding what Jeongin had said untrue. "What made you think that?"

Jeongin shook his head as if to say 'I don't know' as it was just something he didn't know how to explain in words.