Can you let me in?

Chp 36

"The how works, now we have to figure out the when and the where. Almost everyone in this room has had an encounter with one of the infinity stones." Steve says standing in front of the screens.

"Or been damn near killed by one." Tony interjects.

Natasha tried her best to pay attention. She knew the importance of this mission and how they needed to get it right, but her mind couldn't stay focused.

It was flooded with old memories of Wanda, Y/n and Yelena. Ones she had buried far too deep. Her universe that she misses too much, she starts to feel her eyes gloss over the memories. Her hands tighten around the arms of the chair, as her breathing starts to become erratic.

No, she can't lose it. Not here, not in front of them.

She closes her eyes thinking back to Wanda, the memories from just hours ago.

Clint who sits next to her quickly picks up on her distress.

"Nat, how about we go for a walk?" Clint says, breaking her from her trance.

Without much of a thought Natasha stood up and walked out the room with Clint coming quickly behind her.

Clint keeps following her until they end up at the shooting range.

Natasha quickly tosses Clint ear protection, knowing his ears have been getting more sensitive over the years before she grabs the gun off her hip.

She quickly unloads a full clip into the target before putting a new clip in and walking towards the target still shooting at it. Robotically she grabs the second gun from her thigh and keeps firing at the target taking more steps towards it.

Once it is empty she drops the second gun to the ground and collapses onto her knees crying.

Clint takes off the headphones and slowly walks towards Natasha. He kneels down next to her. "It's okay Nat, let it out."

Natasha nods to Clint who quickly wraps her in his arms.

The two sat there for a few hours as Natasha cried. No words had to be spoken, Clint just held her close. Finally Natasha had run out of tears.

"You know, I never thought I would be rescuing you twice." Clint lets out.

"I'm sorry I disappeared on all of you guys. It... it just brought back too many memories." Natasha admits looking down at the ground.

"You never have to explain yourself to me Nat. You know that." Clint says, looking at her.

"You went after bad people Nat. It wasn't the same as before. You did good, just maybe not ethically." Clint adds on smirking.

"I was effective, I was not Natasha. I was the black widow. What if I still am?" Nat admits.

"No one would love you any less. The black widow is a member of this team." Clint says.

"Clint that's not what I mean." Nat says.

"I know, but it still rings true. You are a part of this team. All of us have our demons and they show their faces at different times. It doesn't change our love and trust in you." Clint says. "Plus if Tony and Steve can work together after that whole shit show, a little killing spree is nothing."

Natasha just nods.

"Also can we just talk about how you eliminated every known hydra and red room threat in 5 years. That is somewhat impressive." Clint adds trying to lighten the mood.

"Ha." Natasha gets out.

"You left some fucked up scenes for us to clean up but you cleared out so many threats Nat. You did a good thing." Clint adds.