Out of Time

Chapter Nine - Discussions

Axel appeared at his front door, but I didn't move from my spot.

"Briella?" Axel said as he walked closer and stopped.

"I know you hated me those first few days of school, and you probably still have a part that hates me. But-" I took a deep breath before I continued. "I don't hate you at all. You've embarrassed me so much, and you made me feel worthless. But I don't hate you at all."

"You sat with me when I thought you were Jake. You lied to me to save me from my dad. You saved me from that bridge. You helped me more than you probably know." I said as I started to tear up, and I took another deep breath to keep from sobbing. Then, I looked at the ground.

"I don't know which event it was where I realized this- but-" My heart was racing as I finally looked up at him again, and I saw that he had tears in his eyes too. "I think I'm in love with you, Axel. But I'm not sure cause I don't know what it feels like to love someone. Hell, I don't know what it feels like to be loved by someone- but I just had to say this because if I didn't-"

Axel grabbed my face, catching me off guard, as he placed his lips on mine. My heart soared as I kissed him back and laughed as I pulled away.

"I would hate myself," I said as I finished my sentence.

He hugged me, and he kissed the top of my head. I hugged him back and felt like I melted into his arms.

I got out of his grip as I wiped my eyes and looked up into his bright green eyes.

"I'm sorry for being a bitch earlier. My parents are driving me insane." I said as he smiled down at me.

"I'm sorry for being a dick when I first met you." He said as he kissed my lips again. "Do you want to come inside? Get out of the rain?"

"I would love that." I said as he put his arm over my shoulder and led me to the front door.

When we got inside his house I saw his parents sitting in the living room. Axel dropped his arm quickly as his dad looked over at us. I looked up at Axel confused as he cleared his throat.

"Um- This is Briella. She is a friend from class. Her car broke down outside so I told her she could dry off here while like a tow truck comes or something." He said as I looked down at my hands and noticed I was fiddling with them. Crap. I felt Axel look down at me and then look away.

"So Brielle-" His dad started to say before Axel cut him off.

"Briella."

"Right, Briella, sorry. What are you doing out so late?" His dad said as I stared at him.

"I was just driving and thinking." I replied as I looked up at Axel with what I hoped he would see as essentially begging.

"I'm gonna go show her the guest bedroom where she can dry off." Axel said as his dad stood up and walked with him.

"I'll come with."

"Dad don't do this. Please." Axel said as his dad glared at him.

"You know the rules son." His dad said as Axel looked at me and then at the ground.

"Look, take whatever you want. My phone, computer, TV, but you aren't coming upstairs with us. We aren't going to do anything stupid. We're just friends." Axel said as he grabbed my hand and then looked at me. He broke eye contact as he led me upstairs and to what appeared to be his bedroom.

Once I got into his room he cracked the door and motioned for me to sit on the bed.

"What's going on Briella?" Axel said as I started fiddling with my hands.

"I don't know. I'm just lost right now." I said as I sat down on the floor and he sat across from me against the wall. "I don't understand Annabelle. That was such a nasty rumor."

"Not the Annabelle situation. That's not what I'm talking about." He said as he looked down at my hands and then back up at my eyes. "Where were you?"

"I needed time to myself. There was just a lot of shit at home and it was really building up." I said as I started to fiddle with my hands again. Axel reached over and held my hands steady.

"Talk to me Briella. You know you can talk to me." Axel said as I felt my eyes start to tear up.

"My mom said that I need to stop running from everything. That no one is going to be there to help me out. I-" I took a deep breath as Axel stared at me. Like he was telling me to keep going.

"I think-" I shook my head, "I know I'm depressed. I'm depressed, suicidal, tired." I felt a tear fall as I look up into Axels eyes.

"I need my brother." I said as I sobbed and I saw Axels face fall. Almost as if he was going to cry.

He pulled me to him as I was curled into a ball with my head on his chest. I sobbed as I thought about everything I would do with my brother that I never got to. My brother, my best fucking friend.

I felt Axel run his hands over my hair as I just kept crying.

"Sometimes- I wish my dad was the one who crashed." I said as I sniffled. I had never told anyone that. But I really did. I wish my dad crashed and burned. I wish he had crashed and burned in Hell.

"Please don't wish for your dads death." Axel said as I quickly sat up.

"I've gone through Hell and torture with my dad. I never want to see that mans face again." I said as Axel looked at the ground. He clenched his jaw as he slowly looked back up at me.

"My biological dad died when I was ten years old. I got in a stupid argument with him and told him life would be better with him dead. He got drunk at the bar that night and um- he started to walk into traffic." He took a breath as he shook his head. "I just want to be honest with you Briella and- I know you will regret saying that. You still love your dad."

"No. I won't." I said as I grabbed my keys off the floor. "He killed my brother."

"I get that Briella but just please listen to me-" Axel said as I stood up and started walking downstairs.

"I'll see you in class." I said as I went to open the front door.

"Briella." He said as his mom and I guess stepdad looked up from the couch.

"What's going on here?" His stepdad said as he looked at me and then at Axel. I looked at Axel as I rolled my eyes and walked out. He caught the door and followed me out.

"You aren't leaving here upset. What the fuck did I say that was so wrong?" He said as he closed the door and I kept walking to the car. It was still pouring rain outside but I just didn't care anymore.

"I told you shit that I don't tell people. I don't love my dad, I don't know why you would assume that after the shit I've told you. I came here to tell you that I loved you, but I'm leaving with a lot of hatred." I said as he put his hands on his head.

"I really thought I could trust you. That I could tell you everything, but you are just like the others." I said as I got into my car and turned it on. Axel was pacing his porch as his stepdad came outside and started talking to him. I watch Axel push past him and walk back into the house, slamming the door.

I backed out of the driveway as I noticed it was literally down-pouring rain. It didn't help that my eyes were filled with tears. But, I was driving home. Maybe tonight would be different.