𝐄𝐏𝐇𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋 | g. w

29. a wedding

The wedding of Bill Weasley and Fleur Delacour took place that same summer that George lost hos ear. I had been cordially invited to take part in the festivities as I was closest to the twins and Alfie, perhaps more so than their own parents, and I couldn't decline their invitation even if I wanted to. Which of course, I did. I couldn't miss out on the chance to watch my best friends' brother marry the love of his life.

I only wished it didn't have to be under the circumstances that it was.

I hadn't really spoken with George since the night I watched him nearly bleed to death on the sofa in the Burrow's living room, in fact I had done a pretty good job at avoiding having to deal with the inevitable heartbreak I was sure would come once I confessed to him that my feelings for him hadn't faded in the slightest. I was scared to death that he was going to look at me differently, tell me he didn't love me or that he thought we couldn't even stay friends anymore because of it. I kept telling myself that what I was feeling was wrong, that I had to suppress these emotions, because George wasn't mine. He never really was, it didn't really matter how badly I wanted it to be the truth.

Ever since that night at the Astronomy tower when he told me he loved me and I finally said it back to him; things had been different between us. We were still friends and we always would be, but everything had been turned on it's head and things would in all probability never return to the way they used to be.

So that's why I found myself unable to let a single sentence escape me whenever I was in the same vicinity as him. I just didn't know what to do or say; how to act around him. Things were different now, almost awkward, and I was too proud and too moronic to see that he was in fact hurting as much as I was.

"No, you know what?", Alfie spoke up firmly, his voice raised in a manner that made it perfectly clear his patience was starting to run out. "This is getting ridiculous. I've had it to up here with you two", he raised his hand midair. I could tell he was in no way happy about the sudden shift in atmosphere between me and George. "Why can't you just talk to him?" he spat, running a frustrated hand through his dark blonde hair. "All this tip-toeing around each other you guys are doing is nearly sending me into an early grave. You're aware that boy is madly, incandescently and head over heels in love with you, right?".

I blushed, letting a light chuckle escape me, one that only proved how badly I wanted to escape that topic of conversation. I was always comfortable in talking to the boys about pretty much everything, and yet here I was, barely able to hold back the tears as I thought how pathetic I must have appeared. I could barely look Alfie or Fred in the eyes when they cornered me behind the marquis they just worked together to put up for the wedding. I guess you could say I wasn't exactly overjoyed finding out how obvious mine and George's frustrating relationship status had been to the rest of the world. I had thought I was playing the part quite well, that my anxiousness was barely visible to anyone but myself.

But I was wrong.

Thinking back to it now, I think it was pretty damn evident how conflicted I was feeling. Especially when I barely talked to anyone for a couple of days after what happened to George.

I sniffled, trying desperately to hide the tears in my eyes, but failing miserably. It was as if they had a mind of their own, wanting to be flaunted whenever I found myself on the peak of my vulnerability.

Fucking hell.

I was in deep.

"I don't know what you're talking about. I'm fine. I've just been—I don't know—stressed out lately. I've not slept well recently and with everything happening in the world right now, I haven't been able to stop thinking about the possible outcomes of this war. It's nothing to do with any of you, and it has nothing to do with George. I'm just tired all the freaking time, and I don't know how to process my own emotions properly, I guess."

Man. I'm nearly turning into one of the boys these days, shoving my emotions away like that.

"If you say so", Fred sing-songed, his eyes gleaming knowingly with mischief, making it painfully obvious he didn't believe a word I was saying. To be honest, I didn't really blame the boy. I had always been a terrible liar. "Just know that my brother loves you with all his heart, it's actually quite sickening how much he loves you."

"I love him too." I confessed, wringing my hands uncomfortably, looking down in the ground as to not meet their eyes. I was scared—terrified—that if I did, I wouldn't be able to say any of the things I wanted to. "You know this, Fred. But...I can't tell him how I feel, not again. Not when I'm scared what happened before will happen again. I just can't risk it. It was bad enough the first time around". I gave them both a weak smile, turning my heel around and heading back inside the house, where Ginny, Hermione and Fleur would be waiting, getting ready for the ceremony.

But of course, things were never that easy. I was never able to escape him.

"Rune", he said my name and it felt like my insides were suddenly on fire. I wanted to throw my arms around him, have him kiss and touch me the way I knew he would. But I couldn't. I wasn't ready to face him yet.

"Hi", I murmured quietly, refusing to meet his eyes. I felt his hand clasp around my arm to steady me as I had walked right into him. "Everything alright?"

"It would be. If you hadn't been avoiding me like the plague for the last couple of days", he admitted firmly, putting his hand under my chin to force me to look at him. God, those fucking hands. And those eyes. I'd surely die happy if they were the last pair of eyes I ever saw.

"I—I don't", I hesitated, stumbling over my own words and having a hard time finding my voice. "I haven't been—avoiding you, I mean."

"Yeah, you have", be graced his fingers along my chin, sending shivers up and down my spine and causing butterflies to come alive in my stomach.

Looking into my eyes, deeply, he spoke:

"Now, I want to know why."