My Book of Poems

MBP: Unspoken

"Unspoken"
(Spoken Poetry)

I distance myself, I want to be alone
I don't share my worries, for no one ask me
I don't want to be a burden, I don't want to disappoint them
I want to be myself, I want to be free
But I don't know the real me
Do I know myself? Do I dare to break free?
I don't know, for I don't know what to do

I have a lot of words I wanted to say
But I don't have the courage to let out what I feel
For I know no one will listen, for I know they'll laugh at me instead
I don't want to cry, I don't want them to see me cry
I already have a weak mentality, emotional and physical ability
I don't want to let them know for they might think I'm just kidding

I always look so fine, I smile and frown all the time
But still ---
I feel discourage, I lost my confidence
I feel unworthy, I feel useless
I, myself feels like I'm a burden
I, myself feels like I'm worthless

I do think I don't have a talent, for no one praises and encourages me
I'm kind of a fool, I, myself is a dumb I know
I'm kind of a mute, I don't speak up for myself unlike what other people did
I don't acknowledge my existence, for I feel it's kinda strange
For I don't really know my purpose and I don't know what to choose
I'm still stuck in a dark room

I want to be like the others
Have a goal to achieve and pursue
But this is me, a kind of person who's unable to express herself
This is me, a person who looks like a fool that tends to pretend as a real fool

Full of unspoken words, unspoken worries
But words can't be spoken all the time
Words can also be written
Words can also be done with actions in mind
Unspoken feelings, unspoken heartaches
Just like a fool in a movie
I like to keep everything for myself
For this is me, the person I didn't expected to be
A person who don't want to burden others life
A person who's willing to comfort someone else but can't even comfort herself
This is me, the real me I guess