Tiffany's POV
Drake and I headed out for the day and like he said, he kept my mind from thinking about Amber but for some reason it wasn't really him who was making me forget, it was more to do with Rusty and what I wanted us to be doing. It was wrong but I couldn't stop thinking about it. I'd thought only about Rusty and me, the whole night. Had I made the mistake of being with Drake when I clearly knew Rusty had a thing for me from the start? I knew I had a loving boyfriend but yet I still wanted Rusty. It was wrong and now I've lost my best friend in the whole world and have no one to confide in? I was a mess! I don't know why but I feel a stronger connection with Rusty then with Drake, even though Drake was charming, sweet and caring. There's always been something about Rusty that I've been drawn too but I am with Drake and he deserves my attention so that's what I'm going to focus on. I'll still hold a special part for Rusty but Drake deserves some as well and when I'm ready he'll get his piece, just not now. When? When I was ready, just not right now. My head hurt from all these emotions and thoughts and that's when I lost it and Drake had to pull over to comfort me.
I felt bad, worse even when I looked into his eyes and he told me he loved me and then I'd play with the promise ring on my finger. I'd gotten jealous of Brooke not only a few days ago and here I was doing everything I hated and was against. What was wrong with me? Maybe I was mourning and being a stupid teenage girl with all these thoughts? So I asked Drake to take me home. He didn't ask any questions he just did as he was told. I couldn't even kiss him goodbye, I just got out and ran up to my room where I locked myself in for the rest of the night.
Days later and after having huge fights with my parents about coming out of my room. I had to come out for the her funeral. I didn't want to go, I was a mess! What was worse was I had to fly there and stay with her parents. How awkward and weird that's going to be, being at her house and her not being there? I didn't want to go. I wanted to stay here with Drake and Rusty but my Mum forced me to pack and get ready to go, they'd asked Drake to take me to the airport so that I'd left. I hadn't spoken to anyone in the days as I was locked up. I turned off my phone, locked my balcony and bedroom door and just blasted the music Amber and I loved to listen and dance too when we wanted to be a little silly. I found pictures of her and cried almost all day every day but it didn't help. I felt lost, disconnected and I didn't think I'd ever find my way back. I was in a dark place and I didn't know if I'd find my way back. I haven't been a school, I won't eat. I cry all day and I won't talk to a soul. The only person I wanted and needed was gone. She'd know what to do, she always did. I was strong about not going out but I had to see her one last time so when Mum knocked on the door I told her I would be out soon and I did. I hadn't cried all morning and I was ready to go so I started to bring down my suitcase.
I came out of my room and went downstairs. Drake, Rusty, Jo and everyone I love was there. They went quiet when I walked in but I didn't acknowledge them, I just went to the fridge and grabbed some juice and drank from the bottle. Something my Mum despised but right now I didn't care. I saw her huddled in a corner with my Dad, he had his arms around her and they were swaying backwards and forwards. Whispering in her ear, she looked up at me and came running over pulling me into a tight hug and crying. I held her back but I didn't cry, I think I was all out of tears. "Drake and Rusty came to see you darling" she said softly and I looked over at them and just nodded, Jo tried to talk but I ignored her and looked away.
Drake thought he'd try and came up engulfing me in a hug and kissing my forehead but I didn't react. I just let him hug me thinking he was getting through to me but he wasn't, no one was. I was still lost. I looked at Rusty and I could see it in his eyes that he wanted to hug or kiss me but he knew better and stayed away.
The drive was long, boring and hard. Tears slowly fell down my cheeks as I kept silent in my seat. Drake held my hand and squeezed it every now and then trying to get me to react. I did squeezed back and me whispering gently into my ear that he loved me and he was here for me. I just nodded and left it at that. The car stopped and my heart stopped, I looked at the airport in front of us and knew that this was going to be our goodbye's for now. I stepped out and Drake snaked his arm around my waist, we walked slowly up to the check-in line. I stood there for a moment looking at all the people here, they were oblivious to how I was feeling and really they didn't care. It was just another day for them. I took a deep breath and walked in. "I'm here for you babe" Drake said as we sat down and I started to walk closer to the check-in lady.
Drake stayed with me while they put on our luggage, he asked if I was going to alright travelling alone and my only thoughts were. You're asking me now when I'm about to leave, don't you think it's a little late for questions like that but he knew I was hurting and I'd pushed him and Rusty out of my life for now so I couldn't be mean so I fake smiled and told him I'd be fine. The boarding call came over the speaker box and I looked at Drake "Well I guess this is goodbye...for now?" he looked hurt
"Tiff, call me everyday okay so that I know you're okay?" I looked into his eyes and saw tears.
I'd been killing him for the way I'd shut him out but yet he was still here and willing to wait. Did I really deserve a guy like this? I nodded and he kissed me. It wasn't forced or passionate but soft and nice. "I love you" he whispered as he hugged me and I tried to say them back but I wasn't sure how I felt anymore so I smiled and said
"Thanks" he looked shocked but didn't say anything
"I'll call you soon okay?" I said and he nodded.
I went to walk away when he grabbed my hand "Tiff, I do love you. Please call me okay? Or I'll worry?"
"Okay" was all I said as I turned my on heels and walked up and down the corridor to my waiting plane.
I couldn't look back. I'd was hurting the one who loved me. I couldn't help it. I felt so lost that I didn't know how or what to say to anyone. It was weird. Having a boyfriend who cares so much was new to me and well having feelings for him and his best friend wasn't doing me any favours I can tell you. I found my seat and sat down. I pulled out my phone and stared at it for a while before sending message "I love you" was all I wrote and then I press send.
I didn't wait for the response as I turned off my phone. I closed my eyes and let the tears flow as I feel asleep. I woke to the plane descending and I wiped my wet eyes and yawned. I looked out the window to see my old town underneath us. I smiled slightly and waited for the plane to land. Amber's Mum was waiting at the airport for me and engulfed me into a tight hug "I missed you so much Tiff" I smiled
"I missed you all too"
"You know she was so excited about coming to stay with you these holidays?" I looked at her as she put on a brave face
"I was too" I sobbed and then the water works started and we stood there crying in each other's arms.
After a while she pulled away "Come on, there's plenty of time to cry. Let's get you come?" I nodded and she pulled me into a hug and we walked to the baggage area and waited for my bag.
