21 questions (gxg) (girlxgirl)

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𝕬𝖎𝖞𝖆𝖓𝖓𝖆

Do I even still deserve a POV in this book?

You really don't babes but as a generous writer I'll show the people your thought process behind the choices you made for this sham you call a life and maybe just maybe they'll understand you too.

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I followed Tatianna around for days on end trying to get her to forgive me but she never did. I followed her around for three weeks begging for another chance at our friendship but she never  budged and I deserved it.

Although I actually didn't.

I always talked about how no one cared enough to remember the little things I told them or to even do the little stuff for me and Tati did everything right but Starbucks had to go and fuck it up.

I stopped after 3 weeks because I figured that the constant begging and stalking was going to become annoying at some point. Turns out I did end up being her stalker, what an irony.

Now you're wondering why I'm back with Sam and let me just tell you that I'm not. We have sex and that's it. She has needs and I have needs and that's all it was. She's just extremely clingy that I won't be surprised if people assumed we were dating.

This time it was better. I was using her and she was using me and we were both aware. This time I didn't have any love I wanted to give her in hopes of her reciprocating it.

Back to reality.

Tatianna and another girl I hadn't seen around much just walked past us in the direction of the showers.

She caught us again. I would have felt heavily embarrassed if sadness wasn't the dominant emotion I was feeling.

She didn't look sad when she saw us she just made a jab at Sam and walked away not even sparing me a glance. That sucked.

Sam fixed her shirt then picked up her bag. "Why wasn't she affected when she saw us together?"

I gave her a look of pure confusion.
"Tatianna?"

"Yeah."

"Why would she be?"

"Didn't you break up with her for me?"

"We were never dating."

"Swear?."

"Are you good?"

Sam sat down on the bench.

"I got with you to spite her."

"Why would you do that? We weren't even together."

"Well it seemed like you guys were. I'd always see the both of you sneaking off after classes, I'd see how you guys looked at each-other and I'd notice how lost you guys would be individually till you found each-other again. Sickening to watch."

"Ok so if you thought we were dating why did you still come after me?"

"I-I don't know. I've gone after everybody Tatianna had dated since freshman year and till today I actually can't explain why."

"So you made a game out of sleeping with people she was dating?" Samantha was indeed repulsive.

"Yes. Just seeing her happy made me so mad."

"Maybe you liked her?"

"Ew. No. I hate her!"

"Why?"

"Well she's so perfect at everything it's hard to watch. The perfect looks, perfect grades and perfect friends. But she managed to have only been able to bag some of the most perfect looking but deeply flawed partners and that's the only way I could take revenge."

"Revenge for what!" I shouted getting mad.

"I-" she looked up at me. "I don't know."

"Let me help you out. Maybe it's cause you've never gotten a good grade in your life because you never mentally attend your classes or even bother to study for anything, but Tati does and comes out top of our class every damn time. Maybe it's cause you find a way to push all your friends away while she builds real connections with people around her and gives off the best energy so everyone wants to be friends with her. maybe it's because you've slept with so many people that the only medal you'll ever get is best in jumping bones while her medals are all for winning sport and academic competitions. Maybe just maybe you don't hate her because she did anything to you. You hate her because she's everything that you're not and that makes you mad. Maybe you quote on quote hate her because she gets all the positive attention that you'll never get and this is your sad way of asserting dominance and somehow you also failed at that because as you can see she has never cared and she still doesn't. Why can't you put all this energy into a job or something?"

I picked up my bag from the floor and pulled up my shorts.

"After all this I'm sure everyone that you slept with while they were dating her would still pick her one thousand times over you when it didn't come to just sex. When it came to having someone to talk to, to laugh with, to share moments with it'd never be you over her. It'd always be her. If I wanted to take someone to the movies I'd pick Tati, If I wanted to stroll in the park I'd pick Tati, If I wanted to sit in a coffee shop and talk I'd pick Tati, if I wanted to vent and cry to someone I'd pick Tati, if I wanted to hop on a private jet and go to Paris right this second I'd pick Tati, hell if I wanted to have sex I'd still pick Tati. Over and over and over again I'd pick her and only a blind and foolish person would pick you over Tati. Only a blind person would pick anyone over her"

"Babe."

"You heard everything I just said and that's all you have to say? Just like I said. No substance what so ever. Why did I even agree to sleep with you again after everything you'd put me through before this semester? Sam lose my number."   My heart was beating so loud I could barely even hear myself speak.

And in that moment I knew that I needed to make things right with Tatianna before I lost her forever.

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What the poor naive dingbat didn't remember was that Tati was literally 6 feet away from them.
Gosh Aiya🤦🏽‍♀️
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Upload date: Sunday 17th July 2022