This Can't Be Real

Chapter 24

I take a seat on the bed and look down at the empty opened suitcase on the floor that should be filled to the brim with clothes. "Joe, have you at least decided on what to pack before you go away tomorrow?"

"Not really," he responds while walking into the bedroom from the walk-in wardrobe. He dumps the pile of clothes he has in his arms onto the floor by the suitcase and shrugs. "I don't even know how much I should be taking with me."

"Well, how much do you normally take with you?"

Lowering to kneel on the floor by the clothes, he shrugs again. "This preseason trip is different from the others, Leigh."

"In what way?" I don't see any reason as to why it would be different from all the other times he went on preseason. Although, I can see why it's different as he's normally been a holiday or two by now and feels somewhat relaxed and yet excited to be going back to his everyday routine of footballing activities.

"You know why," he responds quietly.

"Because of me? Joe, I'm fine." I assure, trying my hardest to sound fine when I don't on the inside.

Until now, I've always had either him or Jess by my side to help me out with things. One or both has always been there for me and when I stopped talking to Jess, it's always been Joe. Don't get me wrong, his parents are lovely and they've helped out a lot with watching Zachary and helping us when we've needed it most, but I don't feel that comfortable around them like I think I used to be.

I can hold a decent conversation with them when I need to do so, but other than that I don't really speak to them. I don't know if it's because of what's happened to me and the fact that I'm never alone with them as Joe's there by my side . . . I just don't speak to them like I should.

"Leigh, I don't want something to happen to you and for me to be one of the last ones to know about it because I'm at the other side of the world."

"I'd hardly call America the other side of the world," I mutter while moving off the bed to sit on the floor next to him. "Australia's more of the other side of the world."

"You know what I mean," he sighs.

I pick up a pair of jeans and fold them neatly before placing them in the suitcase. "I'll be fine, Joe. I'm not handless or footless you know."

"I know you're not," he agrees while putting another pair of jeans in the suitcase.

"Then why are you so worried?" I pick up a t-shirt and begin to fold it before stopping suddenly. I turn my head quickly and gawk at Joe as he continues to fill the suitcase with clothes. "Is this about Thom?"

"Where your safety's concerned, it's to make sure he doesn't come near you or any of us." He responds calmly.

"You installed the best security system money can buy in here, he doesn't know where we stay, so what's the point in worrying?"

"I'm not here to protect either you or Zachary," he answers.

"And for all I love you for protecting us-" I place the t-shirt on the floor and crawl over to Joe, sneaking my arms round his waist and resting my chin on his shoulder. "-I think we'll be fine for a few weeks without you."

He abandons all the clothes before him and sulks back into me, his right hand clasping over clasped hands. "I hope so but I think I'm going to see if I can get the last week off so I can come back and be with you both."

"What if I don't want you to do that?" I don't want him to start slacking off his work to be there for me and Zachary because if he's going to start doing that, he'd means well just quit playing football all together because he'd always be asking to miss the away games so he isn't away from me.