This Can't Be Real

Chapter 12

I can't stop staring at the copy of the sonogram that's both on my phone and attached to the fridge with a fridge magnet from New York. It's black and white, and as of right now, it is my pride and joy.

“Are you still looking at that?”

I tilt my head to the side. “Hmm?”

“You know, the real thing is growing inside of you as we speak. It wouldn’t be the end of the world if it had to disappear from the fridge.”

I snap out of my daze and turn my attention to Jess.

“You touch that photo and you won’t have any hands to touch anything with.” My words are said as a warning which has Jess stepping back with her hands in the air.

“Just kidding,” she defends. “I’m just kidding.”

“Good,” I nod. I turn back to look at the photo, my fingers automatically reaching out to stroke over the shiny surface. “It’s just. . .”

“A natural thing in life? Something that will make you rethink the life you don't think you have? Something that happens when you don’t-”

“Something that’s been put into place since I can’t remember anything as important,” I finish, my voice raising so I can overpower her stupid words.

“And that is what it’s took for you to believe what we’ve been telling you about you being pregnant?”

“It’s not just that.” I turn on a shrug to look at her. “It’s just . . . I feel like that’s just one part of my life just starting to make sense. I feel like I have a maternal instinct now. I feel like I need to make cautious choices now.”

“Maybe the first one can be to actually go on a date with your husband?” I know Jess is looking at me despite the fact she has her head down and standing by the dining table. “I mean-”

I shake my head and pucker my lips. “I know what you mean, Jess.” I check the time on the wall behind her and stretch my arms out above my head. “Which is why we are going out for lunch today.”

Her head snaps up and her eyes focus solely on me. I'm waiting for the whole 'This soon? You're rushing it' speech from her but it's not coming. She's just looking at me which is a little off-putting to say the least.

“I better go and get ready, actually.”

“Okay. Well, hopefully it goes better than the last time.” Is what she finally says to me when I'm halfway down the hallway and near the stairs.

“I'm sure it will!” I call back to her before making my way up the stairs.

It's nearing just after twelve o'clock in the afternoon when Joe arrives to pick me up. It may be because he's trying to show off, but with his Bentley parked up across the bottom of the driveway, it's gotten quite a few of the neighbours attention. Some are standing at their front doors admiring the car, while others as quietly gossiping about it in small groups at the end of their driveways.

I almost have a sense of pride about myself as I walk towards the luxury car and gracefully slip into the passenger seat. I was hoping he'd have brought one of his other cars today but deep down, I was hoping it was this one.

“All set to go?” Joe asks once I've gotten my seatbelt on and sitting comfortably.

I nod and we set off for lunch.

The drive isn't long and before I know it, we're pulling up into a car parking space. The engine dies quickly and we get out the car.