This Can't Be Real

Chapter 33

It's like time's repeating its self. One minute, everything's clear and I know what's happening. The next minute, I can't tell what's what.

I'm standing in the middle of what I can only describe to be as a dance floor. There's tables set up all around the room, each rectangular and set up to seat eight people. In the middle of the tables, the centre pieces are luxurious white floral arrangements in tall stone studded vases that are surrounded with tea light candles at the bottom. There's window's to my left which overlook a brightly light city and faintly, I can hear my name being called.

It's my married name that's being called along with Joe's and as I look away from the window I've been looking out of for the past few minutes, I catch the green stare of my husband. He's standing before me looking gorgeous in a simple black suit with bow tie. There's a white rose on the lapel of his jacket and he's smiling.

I return his given smile as he approaches and allow him to pull me into his arms. His right arm wraps round my waist, causing my left hand to move up to his shoulder. His left hand finds my right one and he pulls me closer to him, my body falling flush against his. My eyes quickly dart down to look at my stomach before looking back up to Joe.

"Something wrong?" Joe asks, his smile fading but not going too far.

"I-" I start.

"You've been happy all day, Leigh. I don't want that to change. If there's something wrong, tell me before we start our first dance as a married couple."

First dance? Married couple? Excuse me? "What-"

"I think you've had too much to drink, baby."

Drink? What is he on? I had a baby bump and I wasn't able to get close to him without that getting in the way. Where's my baby? What's happened to my baby? I want to know where my baby is!

"Where's Zachary?" I bravely ask.

"He's sitting with my parents," Joe answers as we move in a slow circular motion. "He's sitting over there."

He nods in the direction of one of the tables and through the faint light, I can see Zachary sitting on his grandmother's lap. There is one difference in what I'm seeing, though – Zachary doesn't seem to be any older than two-years-old.

This is weird.

"New York's beautiful at night," Joe mentions quietly. I look back at him. "I'm glad you talked me into having our wedding here."

"It is beautiful," I agree, a smile appearing on my face. "I just-"

"I just wish you remember it," he finishes.

I frown. He leans in close to me, whispers something in my ear, and places a light kiss on my forehead, causing my eyes to close on their own accord.

When my eyes open, I'm in a completely different place. There's no views of New York, no tables, no dance floor, no Joe. Instead, there's a hospital bed and the room is filled with blue and white times.

Floral arrangements in glass vases are spread out at the windows, as well as on the side table that's next to the bed. Balloons are spaced out around the room, all at different heights as the floor weights stop them from floating to the ceiling.

My head falls to the side as I stare at the balloon's clearly stating 'Baby Boy' in bright blue letters. Have I given birth to another son? Or is everything referring to Zachary?

"Hey, what are you doing out of bed?" Joe says suddenly. I turn on the spot and before I know it, I'm being ushered into the bed. "The doctors told you to stay in bed. It's not good for you to be up and about this soon after the birth. They told you that."

"Where's the baby?" I ask, trying my hardest to hide my confusion.

"He's currently with his Auntie Jess." He explains, fixing the blanket over my legs.

"What's-"

"Zachary's beautiful, Leigh." He gushes as he takes a seat next to me. He takes my right hand in his. "My mum says that he's the spitting image as me but I can't tell. He's only a few hours old and already, he has everyone wrapped around his little fingers."

"Why am I being confined to this bed?"

"You had a caesarean, baby. You were told to not get up and walk around until it was safe to do so."

"I-I guess I forgot."

"It's okay. You'll remember when the time is right. Just like everything else you've forgotten."

I frown for the second time, and just like before, he leans in close to me and whispers something into my ear before pulling back and kissing my forehead. My eyes close and when they open again, I'm in another different place.

It's cold and I can feel my back scrape down a wall. I'm on the cold and damp ground by the time the scraping of my back on the wall stops. My legs are up to my chest and I rock back and forth slightly as I hug them close to my chest.

There's people shouting all around me and all I can think about is crying. My throat's sore like I've been screaming and I'm trying my hardest to keep my modesty with my mini dress, pulling at the bottom of it as it rides up in my sitting position.

"Hey," a male voice coos close to me. A dark shadow crouches down in front of me and a single hand falls onto my knee. "Hey hey, it's okay. I'm not going to hurt you."

My eyes move to look at the male, my head unmoving. The green eyes looking back at me are full of concern and kindness. Something I haven't seen in a guy for a long time.

"You can trust me. My name's Joe. I'm not going to hurt you," he assures. "I'm here to help you."

"H-He-" I stutter, my words failing me like I knew they would.

"I know but I wouldn't do that to you. I'm not like that. I want to help you if you let me." His hand rises up off my knee and he holds it out in front of him for me to take. "I can take you away from here if you trust me enough to do so."

I don't want to say anything. I'm too scared to say anything and just nod. He nods and I place one of my hands in his. He helps me to my feet and as we walk down the uneven path, a jacket is placed over my shoulders, causing me to jump a little as the heavy material falls over my bare shoulders.

"I don't want you to get any colder than you already are," he explains as we make it to the main road.

Car horns and chatting fills my ears and I lean in closer the Joe as he helps me walk towards a waiting car. All I can make out from the car is that it's white and a Mercedes. I'm helped into the passenger seat and with my seatbelt. Just as he's pulling back and about to leave me to get into the driving side of the car, I grab his hand and look up at him.

"Thank you," I whisper, my voice hoarse. It's the only words I can come up with and right now, it's the only words that count.

"Its fine," he breathes. "I wanted to help you." He bends down and rests his forehead against mine. "It's all I ever want to do when it comes to you."

"That's not real," I muffle.

"Everything's real."

"This can't be real, though."

"It's your memories coming back to you, baby. All you have to do is wake up and you'll remember everything."

His head moves and he whispers something into my ear before kissing my forehead, my eyes closing like they did the two time prior.

"All you have to do is wake up," he whispers.

I take a deep breath and open my eyes.