Thoughts and experiences of life and mental health

Prisoner of one's mind Part 12

Being a prisoner of one's mind will cause dire consequences for one's physical self.

*

Never become a prisoner in your mind, this is when you will lose yourself and fall apart piece by piece. Picking up the pieces afterward is near impossible to accomplish.

The reality is, we only realize that we are on the path of destruction when it's too late and the damage has been done. Break free from the demons that haunt the deepest darkest corners of your mind!

Most times, past events we've witnessed, experiences we've had, and the hardships we've faced become the bars that keep us in our mental prison cells.

There are tons of situations in our lives that cause us to become prisoners of our minds.

- Childhood trauma

- Abusive relationships

- Financial pressures

- Emotional trauma

- Natural disasters

- Mental disorders

There was a time when I had been tormented by nightmares, I rarely slept. Alcohol and substance abuse became my reality, and everything began falling apart.

Merely because of some events in my life that I could not confront.

I became a prisoner of my mind. Controlled by emotions that I could not tame.

During my visit to several psychiatrists before I attempted suicide, I discovered I had PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).

Meaning; a disorder characterized by failure to recover after experiencing or witnessing a terrifying event or events. The condition can last months or years, with triggers that can bring back memories of the trauma accompanied by intense emotional and physical reactions.

PTSD due to abuse (reactions)

- Shut down in environments where someone is yelling

- Physical shaking during the day is normal

- You flinch when someone moves too fast

- Triggered by violence

- Afraid to better yourself due to being afraid of the judgment of others

- Apologizing for everything

- The sight of a specific item triggers you

- You want to be social, yet you are afraid to get close to anyone

Over time, we lose control when we allow our past experiences to control us. Similar to pulling a thread from a jacket, the longer you leave it unattended, the more the seams will come undone until the coat is damaged beyond repair.

Our minds are more sensitive than you might believe, unchecked emotions, and unresolved trauma may become a prison that is nearly impossible to break from if left unmaintained.

Make peace with the past. Embrace what happened in your life, bear what you have learned, and help others gain control of their minds.

Once we overcome what keeps us locked up, we become stronger than we could ever imagine.

Some people choose physical strength, I would accept mental strength above physical strength any day. The pain that the mind creates when we are imprisoned is unimaginable.

The excruciating pain from waking up from a nightmare that had been so vivid that physical pain from the nightmare wakes you. The physical body physically experiences the scars left from the lacerations in the dreams, unexplained emotions surface, can't go to sleep because you are scared of what's waiting on the other side, pushing people away.

After all, you are too scared they catch a glimpse of who you truly are and what constantly disturbs your mind.

Numbing the pain with substances, making the experiences more ominous, yet we do it because we convince ourselves that it aids.

This is why I state I desire mental strength.

Make peace with the past before it manipulates your future. I have all these voids in my memories, moments I want to remember but can't, and some moments I don't want to remember but are constantly role-playing in my mind.

I would love to remember some parts of my past so I can deal with them, but unfortunately, these voids seem to control what my mind does from time to time.

Someone once told me that they have this box in their mind, in this box, they preserve all the parts that hurt them, the darkest parts that could create trauma.

The problem with this concept is that this box could rupture, become full, and ultimately explode, and then what? What happens with this unsolved trauma that has been kept in a box for all these years?

Maybe that's where my memories went that I attempt to recall. I don't favor this idea because these traumatic memories might simply come back and haunt my already fragile mind.

Those unfiltered memories and emotions come down like a tsunami, consuming everything in its path. I don't think anyone can be ready for an uncontrolled event like that.

Everyone has their way of dealing with trauma.

I learned emotional trauma should be resolved before it becomes the prison that causes our downfall into the abyss.