(i recommend listening to 'cold' by aqualung and lucy schwartz. happy reading!)
your heart rate increased as tengen approached you two. you knew he would be coming, but you weren't ready to choose yet. "i need more time." you call out to him. "what are you talking about?" gyutaro questions. you ignore him and keep your eyes on tengen. "this is it, [ y/n]. what will it be?" tengen asked.
he smiled devilishly. he knew this was just a game. your mind clouded with memories from both of them. skating in a world of bliss with tengen, slow dancing with the sunset with gyutaro. there were little things they both did that made you love them.
"you can't make me do this tengen." you sigh. "what will it be [y/n]?" he asked again. he stood firmly with his hands in his pockets. the entire time his eyes never left yours. "[y/n] what the f*ck is he talking about!?" gyutaro roared.
you sucked in a breath of air. it was clear tengen wasn't going to be leaving until you told him what he wanted to hear. "i told you there's no competition." you say, "so i don't understand why you're making me do this."
"i don't understand why you can't just say a name." tengen replied. "because i love you both for different reasons like?!" you growl. tengen stared at you blankly causing you to pace back and forth. gyutaro was the obvious choice. but tengen . got damnit tengen! howcould you leave him?
there would be no more hallway talks, him being childish. going out in fancy clothing for regular events. but gyutaro too. there would be no more late night smoking and munchies. no more crazy drives. hell, there wouldn't even be cool places to take you to as the sun set.
a tear ran down your cheek. more tears silently formed a stream as your eyes grew damp. tengen approached you and wiped the tears from your eyes with his thumb. he lifted your head up and smiled.
"you can cry later [y/n], i need to know now." he said. "how could you be so nonchalant about this!?" you cried. "because you've had two months to decide what's going on." gyutaro stepped behind you and pulled you back to him by your side. you shook your head and looked everywhere but at tengen.
"i'm not doing this." you hiss. "but you are, my love ." tengen smiled. that stupid damned nickname. this was so cruel. you felt the pain in your chest as you spoke. "gyutaro."
tengen's smile faded with your words. he cocked his head to the side slightly. "huh?" he muttered. he stepped slightly closer. "repeat it one more time just so we're both sure."
"gyutaro." you said with a shaky breath. tengen nodded his head a few times and backed away. "i see." he hummed. he rubbed his hands on the sides of his jeans. "and you're sure?" tengen asked. "yes." you replied. tengen's body caved in as you spoke the words aloud. you had never seen pain so raw in someone's face.
his eyes looked straight past you, dead at gyutaro. gyutaro tightened his grip around your waist, not letting go. "it's alright baby." he whispered into your ear. you didn't feel as though everything was right though. something in your stomach was screaming in agony. "why would you make me do this?" you sincerely ask tengen. your heart pulsated with each cry that rang out. you knew that you had loved tengen, but gyutaro was only the reasonable answer.
at the end of the day, tengen was your professor. that's how it needed to stay. you should have never hitched a ride from the coffee shop that night. a little bit of rain wouldn't have killed you. tengen sighed, shaking his head. his lips never once parted to answer you. "god this is so f*cking stupid." you bawl . "i'm shocked." tengen chuckled. "YOU FIND THIS SHIT FUNNY?!" you shouted. "no." he replied. his voice wavered at the end of his response.
"let's go [y/n], we don't need to be near him anymore." gyutaro said. "why tengen?" you asked. "i know better now, you've made you choice." tengen said. "i love you [y/n]." with that, he walked away. he walked towards his car but he didn't get into it. he walked past it, and never turned back to look at you.
"what a b*tch." gyutaro chuckled. you didn't say anything. you wanted to defend tengen, but you couldn't betray gyutaro. gyutaro's hand gripped yours as you both walked towards his car. "do you want me to stay with you tonight?" he asked.
you nod. gyutaro didn't question you on the whole ordeal as he drove. you didn't want to show that tengen in fact had just broken your heart. your mind wandered a mile a minute thinking about the whole situation. it was all so damned stupid!
gyutaro's hand rubs circles on your thigh as he drives. you tried your best to keep your tears at bay, but the striking pain in your heart wanted otherwise. your chest repeatedly caved as you silently cried.
you shook your head and wrapped your arms around yourself. the car came to a stop and gyutaro turned the engine off. you both sit in the car's silence for a moment. nothing felt right anymore. how would even be able to go to school and look tengen in the face anymore?
"we're here." gyutaro says. he gets out of the car and shuts his door. he walks over to your side and opens the door. "let's go lay down huh?" you nod and slowly remove yourself from the seat. you should've stayed home. you realized now that you wanted to be alone more than anything.
