Aquiver -> J. Constantine

22

"Where on Earth have you been?"

John looked up as a frustrated Jade made her way to him. She looked through what felt like the entire hospital to find him.

"I'm a little busy at the moment."

He had left Manny temporarily, but he didn't have time to chat. Whatever this thing was that hurt so many people, it was dangerous to let it grow in power.

"Whatever you're doing can wait until you see Zed." Jade argued.

Her friend didn't say it out loud, but it was clear she was craving the presence of her other friends. Chas and John. One was back in the mill, the other was too busy running from his feelings.

"There's nothing I can do to help her, but I can help those poor blokes out there." John replied.

He turned around ready to leave before she could make him do what she wants. He didn't think she was even aware of the power she had over him.

She scoffed. "You are so incredibly selfish."

Her words made him freeze. His eyes closed for a brief moment while he had his back turned to her. It would be a lie if he said it didn't sting to hear that from her.

"Yeah, well, I've made that clear from the start." He said.

He inhaled sharply before taking a couple of steps forward before she spoke again. "John, please."

Her heart beat fast as he reluctantly turned to face her. She wished she could wipe away the frown spread out over his face. Yet she knew there was nothing to be done there.

"I can't be what you want me to be, love. I wish I could."

His words hit deep as Jade looked at him in disbelief. Has she not proven that she likes him just as he is? Flaws and all.

She has been the only person willing to stand by him no matter what. So, she couldn't understand what he thought was her desire for him to be.

"And what is it you think I want?" She wondered.

All she wanted was him. Standing there looking at her with those big sad eyes, she knew he had to know that. It's not like she was being subtle about it, she thought.

"Someone who will hold your hand through this. But I'm not that person. I'm the one who ends your life, remember?" He grumbled.

His tone was harsh yet Jade didn't even flinch. She noticed how he couldn't look her in the eyes and say it at the same time. The thought of killing her was as torturous to him as it was to her.

Jade shrugged. "And of all the ways to die, that might be the most peaceful one for me."

John grimaced at her words even though she attempted to comfort him. What's most peaceful for her was a nightmare for him. He wanted no part in her death.

Jade stepped closer to him and he resisted the urge to back away. He felt poisonous, as if by simply being near her he would cause her death. He told her that everyone around him dies and she ignored it.

She shouldn't have. Maybe everything would be different then.

"I don't wanna die, John. I want to live. But I don't get to choose that. All I can choose is who will be there next to me when the time runs out and that is you." Jade pleaded.

The facade that she held cracked right in front of him. Jade Phillips, the woman destined to die, wanted to live more than anything else.

John lifted his hand to wipe away the tears now freely falling down her face. Yet he couldn't. The thought of touching her made him stop breathing. So he let his hand fall, much to Jade's disdain.