Girls Like You

Prologue

Have you ever felt the feeling na pinaasa ka lang ng taong akala mo gusto ka din nya? After all those small gestures na ipinapakita niya sayo indicating that she cares for you.

Angela feels the same.

She ran and ran until she can't see a glimpse of the love of her life, including the man who will ruin her plans.  Lagi naman akong ganito. Tinatakbuhan ang mga senaryong nakasakit sa damdamin without even knowing the person's side or explanation.

Baka kase pag pinakinggan ko sya, malimutan ko agad ang nararamdaman ko. Kaya mas pinili ko na lang na lumayo. 

"Angela, wait!" Sigaw ng isang taong ayoko munang kausapin and it seems na hinahabol nya ako dahil sa tono ng pagsigaw nya. Didn't expect her to chase me.

"Please ma'am, I just want to be alone. Go back to him, he might be waiting for you." Sagot ko nang hindi sya nililingon. Sakto naman ang pagsagot ko para lang marinig nya.

"Please, just let me explain." Naramdaman ko namang may humawak sa braso ko and I know who's touch is that. Sa isang tao lang naman ako mag-iinit kapag hinawakan ako.

I turn around to face her and she let go of my wrist. I saw her eyes full of worry and sadness. God! I don't want to see her like this. I took a deep breath and waited for her explanation.

"I'm all ears." I said without looking directly at her eyes. I heard her sighed and held my hands once again.

"Look, I'm sorry for everything. But I'm not sorry for all the things I did for you. Those are all true. I like you." She stopped.

I am shocked.

Shocked not because of what I knew but because of the fact that our only Andrea Garcia is confessing in front of me. I don't know what to feel. Sadness or happiness. 

"If you like me, why did you do this to me?". 

As I realized what I have said, tears started falling from my eyes. I looked at her and waited for her answer. There's a part of me which doesn't wants to know it and a part of me which wants the opposite. 

"I'm so sorry. They forced me to do this in exchange of money." Of course, what else can be the reason of this sh*t?

"Andrea!" Called by the man who is talking to her earlier. 

"You should go. He's waiting for you. Besides, I'm just your student, right? Ikaw na mismo nagsabi diba. I'll leave you alone now. Sorry for everything." I removed her hands from mine and smiled at her one last time before leaving her alone. 

Crying, I ran far from the school where I met her. Far from the school where I realized that I am not straight. Where I realized that I like her. I stopped myself from looking at her. I might regret it.

I just wished that I could forget all these things and move on so easily. But I know that it will take a while for me to actually say, 'I finally have moved on'.

Sana hindi na lang ako dito pumasok kung alam ko lang na makikita ko sya. Sana pinigilan ko na hanggang maaga pa. Sana hindi na lang sa kanya. Bakit kase sya pa? Bakit sa taong hindi ko pwedeng makuha?

My phone rang and I didn't even have the courage to look at the caller's name and turned it off. I know it's her. Why would she call me if I already told her to leave me alone?

Maybe love isn't just for me. Pinipilit ko lang ang sarili ko. Maybe I should just focus on myself so I can move on easily.

I lost my happiness, my sadness, my everything. Wait. You're not even mine to lose. 

The moment when I knew what is going on with them keeps on repeating on my mind. It made me feel like I was used by her. For her own sake. Mas naiisip ko ung scene na yon kaysa sa confession that she made before I left her alone. Parang wala lang kasing silbi yung confession na yun kung sa lalaking yon lang naman sya babagsak.  Wala rin naman akong napala.

I just wish her a happy and successful wedding. I can call him lucky because he has what I want. What an unlucky day I had.