egoistic- lee haechan

1.2

"how long have you had this planned...?" narae slouched back onto the cool leather of their booth, blowing a strand of hair away from her face in a bored manner. she glanced at the clock ticking on the wall, surprised to see that the boy had been talking for over ten minutes with no breaks. she had just let him do so, choosing to listen in every now and than, the words becoming a jumble of nonsense as he rambled on. "you really seem to know what to do..."

"not long, it just kind of occurred to me one day after you yelled at me." he said in a nonchalant way, taking a sip of the drink he'd barely touched since it was first ordered. "i realized that it'd be better for our love lives and friend groups if we stopped constantly coming for each other's throats."

"i guess you're right.." she nodded, glancing down at his hands, both wrapped around the beverage. they looked soft, for someone who seemed tough he sure knew how to care for himself. she smiled slightly at the progress they were making, it wasn't going as bad as she had expected.

the boy cleared his throat, the elder meeting his eyes in confusion. he stifled a giggle, seeing her eyebrows raise, as she kept contact, unblinking. "you've been looking at my drink for like... 20 seconds... do you want a sip or something?"

fuck. that's not what she was looking at, but now that she thought about it, it did look pretty good. she was starting to regret being so petty earlier. she sat up, debating, before ultimately deciding to take the offer. "i guess.."

narae grabbed the drink, the adorable pink straw touching her lips for a moment while she hesitated, not regretting a thing as the sweet taste filled her mouth. she found her self smiling a bit, making eye contact with the boy in front of her as she slid the drink back over to his side of the booth. "you act so tough over text and here you are sharing a drink with your sworn enemy." she teased, a hint of curiosity embedded in the joke.

"i'm not a total douche," he shrugged. lightly tussling his hair, he momentarily stopped talking, wondering if this would be something okay to ask. it might have been to pushy, but he really wanted to know. "you know, every single boy in our friend group has liked you at one point, everyone besides mark.."

"im aware..."

"why'd you turn them down? it doesn't make sense to me. chenle is rich, you and jaemin have the best chemistry, renjun was head over heals for you for like.. the entirety of last school year. you were jisung's first real crush. why mark, when he's never shown you any interest?"

as out of pocket as it was, it was something she'd thought about many times, she knew alot of people liked her, specifically her best friends. and she was well aware of how much her rejection hurt them, and how they used to all have a separate groupchat about her, none ever getting their chances. all because of mark. she took a big breath- she figured it'd be best to explain her reasoning if her and haechan were gonna be working side by side on this.

"i don't... i don't care about material possessions like chenle has, it doesn't matter to me. i don't care how long someone likes me or how well we get along beforehand. it's a bonus, yes, but aren't relationships something people are supposed to work on? people are supposed to grow. together."

the boy was about to begin speaking, but was cut off by narae again. he hadn't thought there was so much behind it. he'd guessed it was just being selfish and wanting attention, but he'd guessed wrong. she'd sounded hurt, almost, when she moved on to her next explanation, like it was painful to bring up.

"all of them have only liked me for my looks. that was the first thing they saw and cared about, not that i was a real human with real feelings. it's better as friends... because at least i know they actually care about me. mark was the only one out of that group that didn't make that all i was. he didn't fall in love with me the first day or take turns pursuing me like everyone else did. he was just... my friend. and i respected that, a lot, and it made me want more, i want to experience how good of a person he really is, knowing how he's proved it time and time again. i want him and i have always wanted him."

"narae..." haechan was only staring, his mouth slightly parted as if all the words he wanted to say got stuck. he truly was at a loss for words. back in the past he'd been so annoyed with her for never accepting anyone's offers of love.. now he felt bad... he pitied her.

"i think we should go to school now." she simply said, bringing up her backpack from the floor and placing it next to her.

"aren't you going to ask me-"

"no. drive us to school, haechan."