¶𝗥𝗼𝗰𝗸 𝗕𝗼𝘁𝘁𝗼𝗺 [H.S]

1.8

And somehow I was always the only one left standing in the hallway. Sometimes it was because of the time I wasted doubting the option, and most of the time was because I was too late. Too late to say something. Too late to show I'm trying. Too late to be the one pulled out first. I was just there... It didn't matter if I was still standing, waiting, or on the floor. And I was scared of that same thing. Because being left by a stranger was one thing and being left by someone you gave your years to be perfect for was another. Or, well, I was just being dramatic and this was just my bad luck. Maybe, even the universe showed me how small the world was.

Funny, isn't it?

We always say how small the world is when we bump into someone that doesn't have to do anything with us. But then, when you are screaming, tears mixed with the bath water, and pills scattered on the dirty floor, no one can hear you. Even the person sharing the same wall with you. Then you realize how big the world is but how small you are, compared to it. Then you realize your voice can't be heard, and you just accept that. Just like I'm doing right now. Walking to the cop with the weight on my shoulders, not even thinking about sharing it. Even if Logan Westwood was just a name now, and his life was spread on my and her hands. I guess this was what it meant to be the bigger person, right? Accept the punishment because you were the only one caught. 

"What are you doing here? Don't tell me you did what those other kids do at parties like this?" his voice sounded concerned but his face just showed anger.

I shook my head.

''No, I wouldn't do a thing like that," I slightly furrowed my brows as he reached for my hands, making me realize I was doing it again.

''I'm sure, darling,'' he assured, moving me towards the coach. I sat down, moving my hand over my chest to scratch the upperside when in reality, I was covering. ''What happened?'' he asked, sitting beside me.

Nervously licking my lips, I looked down at my lap. My heels raised from the ground as I stood on my toes. There was someone else's scent on my skin and the last laugh of someone that can't be brought back. It was normal to feel uneasy while talking to a police officer but he was a family friend, and I wasn't anxious to share a few words with him. Truthfully, I felt embarrassed about things everyone does. Sex went all back millions of trillions of years back and it wasn't something to decide a person's worth. Well, at least it wasn't supposed to. But God knows, I was scared down to my bones that there was a hint of sexual activity on me. I knew he couldn't tell if I was fucked or not but then again, freshly fucked people had an unhinged scent. I hope the vomit scent was stronger than the other one.

"I came here with Aiden, and we danced and had fun,'' I was looking at my thighs picking all the small flaws on them instead of facing him. But it seemed like the strawberry syndrome had caught me. ''And I just woke up and-'' the cellulite on them was so obvious. Oh, did I regret coming with shorts on? ''And what is going on exactly?" I finally looked up too embarrassed when I realized a part of them was unshaved. If I kept looking down I was going to draw him to do the same, and I didn't like people looking at the wrong stuff going on with my body.

He took in a breath, looking around. And then his hand was placed on my leg, I really hoped he couldn't feel the slight hairs. ''Promise to be good, and don't tell your friends," he leaned to whisper.

Swallowing hard, I nodded at him ''You know I'm a good girl, officer."

He tilted back, laughing slightly at the nickname. I used to call him that instead of his name because I was scared he was going to put me in child jail. My lips also curled into a smile while on the inside I was rotting from sadness. There was so much going on and no time to figure out what I was feeling nothing about it.