Medicine - T. Nott

ten

Note: I call the first part of this chapter the Evan Interlude.

- - - - -

June 24th, 1979

I think I really fucked up this time. I've made a lot of mistakes but I don't think that this is something I can come back from.

Barty and I got into a massive fight last night. It started out as something small, then it just kept escalating until he was yelling and I was slamming the door in his face. Normally, I would go talk to Reg after I fight like this but he's been holed up in Grimmauld Place since the term ended. It's probably because of this bitch of a mother, but that doesn't matter. What matters is that I couldn't go talk to Regulus about it.

So I picked the next best option and ended up at a bar in downtown London. I had a few drinks before Cordelia Travers walked over. We went to school together and had a few classes together but she's a Ravenclaw. She bought me another drink then asked me if I was single. I told her I'm not sure anymore.

I fucked up so badly.

We ended up shagging in the bar bathroom.

Then I left and came home. Barty was still awake so I apologized for the fight and he forgave me. I don't think he's ever going to forgive me for this though. I still have to tell him, right?

Evan Rosier

- - - - -

August 16th, 1979

So I guess I fucked up even worse this time.

Cordelia sent me a letter last night asking to see me and I met her at the Leaky Cauldron for lunch today. She's two months pregnant with my kid.

I kind of freaked out when she told me and just didn't say anything for a solid 20 minutes. I still don't know what to say. It was an accident. I'm only eighteen. There's a war going on and I'm running back and forth doing things to please the Dark Lord so that he doesn't kill me. Regulus died six weeks ago.

This is the worst time to accidentally get someone pregnant. But, Cordelia said she's keeping it so I guess I'm going to be a dad in about seven months.

Somehow, by the grace of Merlin himself, Barty didn't kill me the last time I fucked up, but I wouldn't put it past him this time. Everything is still so fragile, especially since Regulus died.

I don't know what I'm going to do.

Evan Rosier

- - - - -

March 15th, 1980

So I have a daughter now. She was born two days ago. Her name is Alexandria Vivian Rosier and she looks just like me. She's so tiny that I just want to hold her and protect her from everything bad in the world.

I know I didn't help out much at the beginning of Cordelia's pregnancy but I promise I will now. After holding Alex I don't know how I could ever just leave her or ignore her. I'll admit, I was terrified of being a dad, I still am, but I want to be a good dad. I want to be better than my dad was to be.

Cordelia and I agreed that she and Alex are going to live with me for the first couple of months. It'll be easier than splitting time, and if we have to do that then I'll never get to see my daughter. Tonight is the first night home from St. Mungo's and I'm not quite sure how it's going to go.

I've actually grown to like Cordelia. She's funny and kind, and I don't mind her presence in my flat, the flat that used to be me and Barty's. Cordelia's great, but I'll never love her like that. We have a daughter together, and we live together, but we'll never actually be together.

I think Reggie would've really liked to meet Alex. He likes to pretend that he doesn't like kids, but he's a big softy whenever there's a baby around. I miss him a lot. I actually think I'll miss him forever. He was my best friend.

I also miss Barty. I still see Barty whenever the Dark Lord calls a meeting, but we haven't spoken in months. If I were him, I wouldn't want to speak with me either.

So, I'm a bit lonely, but at least I have Alex now.

Evan Rosier

- - - - -

December 9th, 1997

"Alex, I was looking for you."

I look up from my dad's journal just as Theo sits down in a chair beside me. He leans his elbow on the table and holds his head up with his hand, peering over to see what I'm reading.

I close the journal and give Theo a small smile.

"How far have you gotten?" He asks, nodding towards the journal that I'm currently putting back in my bookbag. His voice is quieter than usual since we're in the library.

"I just got to his first entry after I was born," I answer.

Theo raises an eyebrow. "And how was that?" He asks.

"Well, it makes up for him not wanting me when my mum told him she was pregnant," I say. "Though he had every right to not want me at first. All that matters is that he did want me."

Theo smiles softly. "I don't see why anyone wouldn't want you, Alex."

I smile and feel my cheeks starting to heat up. So I clear my throat. "You said you were looking for me?" I question.

Theo lifts his head from his hand. "Right, I almost forgot about that," He says. "I was going to ask if you wanted to go to lunch. It's not over yet, so we'd have some time before Potions."

I glance down at my watch. "Putain," I mutter. "I didn't even know that it was lunch. I've been here my whole free period."

Theo smiles at me.

"What?" I ask.

"Did you know that you have a tendency to swear in French?" Theo asks. "You never actually speak French unless it's to swear."

I smile back at Theo. "Did you know that you do the same thing? I've never heard you say anything in Italian other than fuck, motherfucker, or son of a bitch," I tell him. "I'm beginning to think you're lying about being fluent."

"I assume you, I am not," Theo says.

"Prove it," I tease.

"Prove it? Porca puttana," Theo mutters. "Non sto mentendo, in realtà parlo correntemente l'italiano. Anche tu mi piaci."

I grin, "See, that wasn't too difficult now, was it?" Theo rolls his eyes at me. "Now, what'd you say?"

"I said that I'm not lying about being fluent," Theo answers. "But I could say the same thing about you."

"Eh bien, je ne mens pas non plus sur le fait que je parle couramment. étonnamment, je peux réellement parler français," I say.

Theo smirks, "Perfect, now we can go to lunch."

I stand up and gather all of my things into my bookbag. Theo grabs my hand as we walk out of the library and intertwines our fingers together. The corridor is full of people as we walk to lunch.

"So," Theo starts. "What do you want for Christmas?"

I glance up at Theo. "I don't really want anything," I answer thinking back to Theo's response when I asked him what he wanted for his birthday. "I'll like anything that you get me," I add.

Theo groans, "I was hoping you were going to have a written list of things so that I didn't have to stress about it."

I squeeze his hand. "Like I said, I'm sure that I'll like anything you get me."