That night, Kuroo and I decided to stay up playing Pokemon and smoking. I didn't think he'd really be all that into it, but maybe he's a social smoker?
We did some battles and messed around with wonder trading. I ended up with a shiny Mimikyu. I feel bad for the guy that got my level one Magikarp though.
Before we knew it, it was getting light out and we still hadn't slept. After the past few days with some breakdowns, cutting, crying, we thought a little time to try and calm down was needed. It definitely was, but it didn't help much.
I wasn't looking forward to going home tomorrow. Back to my parents. I can only imagine what I'll be dragged into.
I tried not to think about it, but that's all that was on my mind all day through every match. I was honestly scared…I didn't want to be dragged into anymore. They're my parents, yeah, but that's not my fight to be in. It's theirs. I wish they'd see how it affects me.
The constant fighting made me want to kill myself.
*~*
That night, I sat awake thinking. I was exhausted, but my mind wouldn't slow down. I didn't want to go home.
Eventually, here I was, going on day two of not sleeping. I didn't wanna move, but we still have today left of camp and games left to play. I ever so slowly dragged myself out of my blankets and got ready.
I met Kuroo outside as usual.
"Didn't sleep?" He asked.
"I'm scared to go home." I admitted.
"Do you want me to go with you?"
"No…it'll be fine. If it gets too out of hand I'll text you." I didn't want him there to see or hear it. He just nodded and we went and got breakfast.
I chugged down an energy drink (or two…maybe…) hoping to get some kind of energy to get through the day.
At the gym, we were told we're playing one set against each team and then there's a surprise for a late lunch. Shouldn't be too horrible of a day.
After three matches, I was about out of energy. I drained every last bit I had. I subbed out and sat on the bench for the last game. I watched my team put up a decent fight against Shinzen. They ended up losing 23-25. Still not too bad.
"Alright, gather up! To celebrate all the hard work you guys have done this week, we set up a little cookout for you all. There's all kinds of meat, fruit, soda, tea, have at it. Great job this week everyone!" Shinzen's coach said. Kuroo, Bokuto, and I walked outside together. We grabbed food and then sat at the top of the hill.
"I'm not ready to go home." I said. I know I already said it, but it's all I could think about.
"I know, it'll be okay. I promise." Kuroo reassured me.
"And I'm always a call away. Day or night, I'm usually up anyway." Bokuto chimed in. I just nodded.
I'm tired of being my parents' punching bag. It just seems like all these petty fights pile up and they need something to take it out on, and apparently that perfect someone was their child.
When it was time to head home, I honestly wanted to cry. Kuroo tried to distract me as much as he could on the way back to the school, but I ended up curled up in my seat silently crying.
On the walk back home, I could feel myself starting to panic. I tried to tell myself it'll be no different than just coming home from a day at school. That could be the case, but what if it isn't?
Kuroo and I split ways at our doors. I stood at mine and took a deep breath. Maybe everything will be just fine.
I walked in the house to hear my parents upstairs yelling at each other. Great.
"I'm back from camp!..." I yelled up the stairs. I took my shoes off and started to unpack my bags, throwing dirty clothes into the wash basket so I could do that later.
I headed upstairs with the rest of my things to put away. My parents were in front of my room yelling.
"What's going on?" I asked.
"Found these hiding in your room. Care to explain how you even got your hands on them?" My mom yelled. She held empty cartridges from my pen.
"I…um…" I didn't know how to respond.
"I swear to God, if it was Kuroo who started this shit -"
"Mom, it wasn't Kuroo. It was a kid on another volleyball team that we have practice matches with sometimes."
"It doesn't matter where you got them, you're grounded."
"Understandable…" I looked at the ground.
Disappointment
"No video games, indefinitely." My dad said.
"Okay, hold on, are you serious right now?" I argued back. My main outlets for when I was at home were taken from me.
"Don't you fucking argue back, maybe if you weren't hiding drugs we wouldn't have to do this." He yelled.
I started crying because i was pissed at myself. Not a great idea…
"You wanna cry? I'll give you something to cry about." He hit me.
You deserve it.
"I'm sorry…" I cried harder. It only got me hit again.
"I'm done, you're lucky it's only video games we took. Get in your room, and don't come out." He yelled. This time, it was my own fault I got yelled at and hit, no doing of my parents.
Do it again.
I shoved past them and threw my bags to the corner to be dealt with later. I sat on my bed crying, exhausted, in pain, and unable to think straight.
I sat there and cried and was stuck in my head all night. When I heard my parents go to bed, I made a stupid decision.
I quietly went downstairs and rummaged through everything I could to find whatever pills I could. Eventually, I came across some tiny red pills in a big blue bottle.
One to stop the chills
Two to ease the pain
Three to wash my guilt
Forget all my shame
Five could never hurt
Six couldn't be worse
… here we go again.
I went back to my room with the bottle and pulled out six. The last thing I really remember doing is picking up my phone and texting Kuroo;
Kenma;
I love you ❤
Word Count;1094
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Six Pills - A KuroKen Fanfic
Fanfiction~Tiny red pills in a big blue bottle wish I had the strength back then need to get a refill chase away the evil all the whispers in my head~ Kenma, just a kid who kept fighting for his life. Kuroo, the one that helped him do it. they were childhoo...
