Sans-ational adventure (Konosuba x Male reader)

Chapter 75: Uselessness competition

 " ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

Your POV:

"Do you mind if I borrow that rope every now and then ?"

Kazuma: Yes. I intend to use it against monster, not... Whatever you were planning on doing. Now help me untying her. If Aqua or Megumin saw this, they would definitely stare with empty eyes.

"... It's funny when you think about it... These skills are affected by luck, right ? Just like you always seem to get panties with 'Steal'..."

Kazuma: It really feels like the skills I'm learning are steadily deviating toward the dark side. Hey, Darkness, are you alright ? I'm not sure how to put this, but I was actually holding back with that Bind...

Darkness: This... Is after you held back... ? Erm, Kazuma... I'll pay you next time. i'm willing to pay, so don't hold back.

"Something stupid. For a change."

Kazuma: ... ... Hm ? Hey, there's something... My "Enemy detection" skill is acting up.

"... It would be tough to explain this situation to the others. And the rope wont come off until the skill runs out of time. So on the meantime, i'll just take Darkness and-"

Kazuma: Get in there !!

*Creeeeaaaaak*

Aqua: Few, that was exhausting. Let's take a break. Good work, Megumin !

Megumin: You say you're tired, but weren't you just playing with Emperor Zel the entire... Hmm ? Kazuma ? Uhh... Where is your shirt ?

Kazuma: I spilled tea on it, so I had to take it off.

'... ... Why did he shove us in that closet ? Did he think I couldn't make it to the stairs in time or something ?'

Darkness: Huff... Huff... Huff...

Megumin: You're alone ? Where did Darkness go ?

Kazuma: Oh, Y/n needed her help with something, so they stepped out.

Aqua: Stepped out... From what my clear eyes tell me, they must be in one of their rooms.

Kazuma: Then why are you going to check ?!

'Well... I can get why'd he panic. Two guys, one of them being shirtless, standing over a tied up girl writhing on the ground... Even knowing all context, that would be something. See ? This is what happens when you don't keep yourself in check and ask for weird things.'

Darkness: ... ... ... ... ...

*CHOMP*

'HNGH... ! You... ! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhh... Why'd you go and bite my hand ?! What did I do ?!'

Darkness: 'I can't... Hold it... If I don't bite something...'

'... ... ... Now that I think about it... '

*POP*

"I guess in his panic, Kazuma forgot I could do that."

Darkness: Haah... Haah... Haah... Please... I need to grit my teeth to endure it...

"Of course you do..."

Aqua: Darkness ? I thought I asked you to watch over Kazuma. What are you doing in here with... ... ... ... ... ...