Sans-ational adventure (Konosuba x Male reader)

Chapter 144: Passive-Aggressive

" ": You talking

' ': You thinking

* *: Narrator/Voice-off

3rd person POV:

Aigis: What a coincidence to run into you here, bro ! Could this be fate ?! We might ave pretty good compatibility with each other ! If Kazuma-chi ends up reborn as a beautiful girl, I might let you get inside me !

Kazuma: Who the hell is Kazuma-chi ? And don't just call me bro.

Aigis: Ojou-san, you probably can't make any breast milk yet, so just give some milk that's the same temperature as your body.

Nerimaki: Armour-san really sexually harasses everyone every night, don't you ?

Aigis: Sexual harassment is a demonstration of affection, Ojou-san. You want to stick your finger inside me ? It's quite warm, you know ?

Nerimaki: You know that Crimson Demons are the strongest, most combative group there is, right ? Picking a fight with them... You're really amazing. There really is a fine line between bravery and stupidity.

Kazuma: ... So, what are you doing here ? Didn't you get taken away by Eris ?

Aigis: Oh, yeah, listen to this, bro ! She's outrageous ! She tried to give me to a swordmaster Nii-chan ! And yet another intolerable pretty boy too ! He got mad when I teased the girls around him, so I ran away from home !

Kazuma: Well, I get that, but why did you come to the Crimson Demon Village of all places ?

Aigis: ... The Crimson Demon Village is surrounded by nothing but strong monsters. That's right, I gave him a trial ! One to determine if he truly is a man fit for me !

Kazuma: 'The chief's trial and now this one, why does everyone here like trials so much ?'

Nerimaki: Dear customer, didn't you say "Ah, the Crimson Demon Village is full of beauties just like I heard ! I'll stay here from now on !" the other day ?

Aigis: Now now, Ojou-san, don't say such things in a conversation between gentlemen. here's for the milk, keep the change.

Nerimaki: ... Are those fragments of some sort ?

Aigis: They are pieces of my shining body. I'm made of Orichalcum, after all. You can probably make enough to buy a castle by selling me.. You two are kind of scaring me here, so can you please stop looking at me like that ? Your face is too close, bro. Here's the body temperature milk that this Ojou-chan just brought me. It's my treat, so chug it down.

Kazuma: Why did you order it if you can't drink it ? Anyway, will you be staying here for a while ?

Aigis: Well, I'll probably go to an Eris Church to meet with my master again after I've had my fill of playing with the beautiful ladies here... Ojou-chan, haven't I already paid for my stay in advance ? Could you please stop scraping me ?

Kazuma: Well, it's great if you're staying for a while; the truth is, i'm here with the guy that caught you back then to help someone with the trial to become the chief of this village. I might need your help at some point, so can I count on you if that happens ?

Aigis: Oh, that guy is here too ? Well, I'll be free anyway, so I don't really mind, so long as he doesn't try to force me back to that swordmaster... But can you please stop this girl before she scrapes all of me away ?

Kazuma: ... Okay, I know I spent the night away, so I don't really have a say in that, but what happened here ?