Not just a fan..

Dont deserve this

Nirvanas POV
Now it was just me and the guys.

"Is Kar ok?" Sam asked Nate when he came back down.

He nodded and took a drink of water.

I go on Twitter and see that i have a bunch of new followers and mentions. I look through mine and Kars and am immediately upset.

"Im gonna go to sleep. Girls day was tiring." I say kissing Sam and heading upstairs.

Tears pricked the corners of my eyes and i put my hand over my mouth to keep in my sob.

I thought I could handle this.

I change and jump into the bed, shielding myself w the covers.

The tears soaked into my sleeves and i breathed fast.

I went back on Twitter and looked through more.

How do they know all this stuff? I see things about my family and things in my past.

I gasped and felt like i couldn't breath. My vision was blurry and my chest was tight. I was having an anxiety attack.

I cleared all the bad thoughts and slowed my breathing.

Sammy walked in and i dove under the covers.

I wiped my tears and pretended to be asleep.

He slid in next to me and spooned with me. He kissed the back of my neck and squeezed me gently.

"Love you baby." He whispered knowing i was awake.

"Love you more." I whisper feeling guilty that his fans hated me and knew i wasn't good enough for him.

"I'm gonna take a shower Sam. I can't sleep." I say slipping out of bed and locking the bathroom door.

I turned on the shower and got in.

I put my face in my hands and just bawled.

Karlee doesnt deserve this. I dont give a shit what they say about me but Kar defintiely doesnt need this.
I stop crying and steady my breathing before getting out and getting back into bed.

Sam was sleeping by time i got back and was snoring loudly.

I groaned and walked out to the livingroom.

"Can i sleep out here with you guys? Sam is snoring really loud." I giggle.

Kenny, Nash, and Carter agree and i sit between Nash and Kenny on the couch.

I fall asleep with my head on Nashs shoulder and my body wrapped in a blanket like a cacoon.