Always you.

Chapter Thirty.

TW: Abuse.
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There I was, hiding myself under the blankets. Cowering away from the claps of thunder roaring through the room, lightning striking bright enough to make it feel like daytime again.

Dads shouting at Mum again.

I stand still. I know what happens. Im back at my childhood home in London. If only I could warn my younger self about what's going to happen tonight.. if only I could tell mum to pack our bags and leave...

After a while, the deafening sound of thunder had stopped,but the shouting didn't.

I crept out of bed and opened the tall, white door and tip-toe over to the stairs to observe the argument happening below.

I follow behind my younger self. I sit next to her and listen...

"I saw you with her Derek! Those late nights in your office...you missed your daughters birthday party last week to go see some whore!"  My mum cries.

"Shut up! How dare you call her a whore! I've seen the way you look at men when we go out in public! Batting your eyes at any man who breathes in your direction! Now who's the whore?" Dad laughs in mums face as she slowly walks backwards, soon walking into the counter. She has nowhere to move.

Now I'm back here again. Maybe I can stop what's going to happen... I try to move but I can't... I look over to my younger self, eyes filled with tears.. I never did like people shouting.

"You and that poor excuse of a child upstairs belong to me! Me?! You hear me! Ill do who I want, when I want... consider yourself lucky I even come back to the both of you! God Alice, look at you! You're an embarrassment.. I'm ashamed to show you off to my family! You ruin my image! I risked the reputation of my families business marrying you and this is how you repay me? By being ungrateful?! I could have had any woman I wanted yet I chose to be with you and I now have a stupid bitch for a wife and a kid who doesn't know what gender they are! All you do is complain and question my every move. Im the boss around here! I ask the questions! Not you! "  Dad spits. Grabbing mum by the throat.

"Derek... st-stop... this i-isn't f-f-fair..." mum chokes out.

SMACK!
"You will listen to me!"

SMACK!
"You will sort yourself out and stop being an embarrassment to me and my family!"

SMACK!
"I'm in charge! You keep your fucking mouth shut from now on!"

I can see myself flinching at every punch that hits my mum... My childhood died that day. I didn't do anything, I just stood there... I know I was only 6 but maybe if I just shouted, he would of stopped and realised he's making a big mistake.

"Y/N?"

"Y/N?"

"Hello?"

I finally pull myself out of the traumatising memory and I'm back in the room with Scarlett.

"Uh.. yeah, I uhm I'll be right back." I stutter as I make my way to the bathroom and splash my face with cool water.
I lean over the sink and cant help but stare at myself in the mirror....
Get a grip Y/N.. just explain the rest. You can do this. To live my life with Scarlett she needs to know my past..
I dry my face with the bottom of my T-shirt, sigh and walk back into the Living room..

After my mother took a few more punches and kicks from my father, he backs away from her almost lifeless body laying on the floor.

He notices my younger self that is now standing in the doorway. I try to move to protect what's left of my innocence a little longer but I seem to be frozen in place.

He storms over and picks me up.
"Okay let's get you to bed little one, your mother had one to many glasses of wine." He speaks. His voice being softer than what it was when he was shouting at mum.