detention || minsung

20

"hey ji, you doing alright?" felix asked as he walked out onto jisungs deck where he was smoking.

"i don't know." jisung said quietly.

"do you want to talk about it?" felix asked gently.

"not really." jisung spoke, his words almost coming out as a whisper.

"okay." felix nodded. "do you want anything to eat?"

"no."

"okay.." felix frowned.

"i need some alone time." jisung said quietly.

"okay ji. i'll leave you alone. please let me know if you need anything." felix said with a sad smile.

jisung only nodded as felix walked back inside. he sighed as he took a drag from his cigarette.

get it together jisung?

what is wrong with you?

"hey bub, felix said you wanted to be alone but i just wanted to ask if you've taken your meds." hyunjin spoke softly.

jisung shook his head, taking another drag.

"please try not to skip them. i don't want you destroying yourself." hyunjin said as he stood next to jisung.

"what if those meds are destroying me? it's a fucking chemical imbalance hyunjin the meds aren't fixing me! they're just numbing me!" jisung lashed out.

"jisung, take a deep breath." hyunjin said calmly. he was admittedly a little hurt by jisung being so harsh, but jisung was his priority right now.

"taking some stupid pills isn't going to fucking fix me!" jisung yelled.

"jisung, it's okay." hyunjin said gently.

"no! it's not okay! go away!" jisung yelled out, pushing hyunjin away.

"okay..." hyunjin nodded sadly, walking back into the house.

stop being so self destructive. you know hyunjin is only trying to care about you. but it's better if we distance ourself from our friends. that way they won't be so upset when-

"jisung, why is hyunjin crying?" chan sighed as he stepped out onto the balcony.

"I JUST WANT TO FUCKING BE ALONE! WHY IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK?" jisung screamed, felling hot tears begin streaming down his face.

"you're upsetting your friends." chan said gently.

"does how i'm feeling not matter?" jisung scoffed as his eyebrows knitted together. "i shouldn't have to feel bad for asking for space."

"you're right. you shouldn't. but you're lashing out on your friends and it's making them upset." chan said, walking back into the house.

you've done it again, han jisung.

jisung sighed, wiping the tears off of his face. he took another drag of his cigarette as he looked up at the clouds.

"we can just sit in silence." he heard from behind him.

"hyung." jisung turned around, feeling more tears gather in his eyes.

"what's wrong?" minho asked gently, walking over to jisung.

"i just...i feel like crap. my mood is so off today and i was trying to push everyone away but i feel so bad." jisung said as he let the tears run down his cheeks.

"it's okay bubs." minho said as he pulled jisung into a hug.

"it's not okay! nothing is okay!" jisung sobbed.

"do you want me to leave too?" minho asked gently. "i don't want to leave you alone right now but if that's what you want then i respect that."

"can we just go cuddle or something? i'm tired." jisung mumbled.

"yeah, that's okay." minho nodded.

jisung put out his cigarette, throwing it away. he followed minho inside, locking his bedroom door. he walked over to his bed and crawled under the covers next to minho. minho opened his arms, allowing jisung to comfortably cuddle him.

"i need to apologize to hyunjin." he sighed.

"i'll go to my room and you can go apologize. to chan hyung too. and then we can cuddle after okay?" minho said gently.

"yeah. i don't want to wait, i should talk to him now." jisung nodded as he got up.

minho went to his room while jisung knocked on hyunjins door.

"hyunie?" jisung called out.

seungmin opened the door, glaring at jisung.

"he's still crying." seungmin stated.

"can i come in?" jisung asked. he'd never seen seungmin angry at him and it made him feel bad.

"why?" seungmin questioned.

"so i can apologize to him." jisung said as he fought back tears.

"fine." seungmin rolled his eyes, stepping aside to let jisung in.

a/n: oooouuuu angst. how are you my loves? i'm doing okay!