oneshots. [dsmp/chuckle sandwich/others]

people watching.

pairings: schlatt / reader
genre: mainly angst... then it
turns sort of romantic fluffy
warning(s): schlatt belittles him-
self, negative thinking
song(s) to listen to: people
watching ; conan gray
other info: use of she/her
pronouns, schlatt&ted&charlie
work at a kroger (grocery store) lol,
alternative universe, in which these three
aren't youtubers

his shift had just started his shift, but god, schlatt wanted to go home.

his caramel orbs observe the people that pass by as he busies himself fixing up some flowers (yes, he knows working at the floral department is the furthest thing from his comfort zone... but they needed people, he needed money). it especially sucked because people came to the floral department for their significant others, and schlatt got the punishment privilege of hearing about the significant others. it was awful when it was his buddies, ted and charlie, when they got off work to go home to shae or grace.

he wasn't a complete asshole, he was happy for his friends! shae and grace were great people, even if he's met them once. fifth wheeling, on the other hand, was not schlatt's favorite thing in the world.

but it got schlatt thinking, and spiraling....

would he be alone forever?

it was well known by his co-workers he wasn't... the most people person. sure, in his interview he was charasmatic and friendly, but that's the persona you would put on for an interview. but something he never really thought about was having someone like how ted had shae, like charlie with grace. it only struck him then and there, he wanted that too.

would he ever voice this outloud? hell no, especially not to ted and charlie. knowing them, they would try to play wingman to him, helping him find someone who he would eventually end up not liking. he was fine on his own... wasn't he? his whole persona of not giving a shit and insulting others had led to closing himself off, the wants of physical intimacy and a true relationship being tucked away in his mind. until now.

it struck him pretty hard that that whole aspect of being human had been missing from his life. maybe it was the years of telling himself he wasn't good enough for a relationship, that he just wasn't the type. but maybe he was. his brain swarmed with those awful, awful thoughts once again as he goes to set down the scanner in his hand. his boss would be here any minute, and he would be told to go help another department. not that he minded, he felt being busy would probably be for the best. what he didn't expect was the ping of his phone, making him pull the electronic from his jean pocket.

from: boss lady

hey j, can't make it in. my daughter

had an emergency, so i thought that

you could train the new girl i metioned

the other day. i know you'll do great,

keep me updated on how it goes!

well damn. more floral duties, he supposes. but a new person? he had to admit, he did not remember his boss talking about a new girl-

"excuse me- this is the floral department, right?" schlatt jumps a bit at the sudden voice, whipping around to gaze at the figure that owned the voice, which makes him freeze. in front of him had to be the prettiest girl he had ever seen. he stays quiet for a moment, trying to figure exactly what to say, which seems stupid in that exact moment. all he had to do was say yes.

"ah.. uh- floral department, yeah, that's here-" smooth, casanova.

the female only smiles, and schlatt felt his whole body tense up in the best way possible. her smile was like the gods grabbed a ray of sunshine and crafted it from their hands. cheesy. where was all of this coming from? he leads her to the back to set her stuff down, talking her through the basics of the job, trying to ignore how each time she laughed at some dumb comment or joke he made it made his heart race. this job was going to be a lot better but worse with her working here.

. . . .

schlatt had gotten home relatively early, able to close up floral early. currently, he was on a group discord call with ted and charlie, his pals, dare he say... his best friends. they had all gotten off around the same time, charlie being the last home due to working up in the front as a cashier. they ahd started by playing some games to decompress after the long day, but now they were just talking. the dynamic was nice; schlatt with his witty and crude attitude, charlie's puns, and ted's chaotic neutral borderline chaotic evil persona blended well together. maybe they should start a podcast together.

he trusted these boys, and it felt nice to talk about their day and crack jokes with them. well... he likes the boys okay, except for when they tease him about things they know he'll get flustered.

"so schlatt, who was the girl you were staring at with the biggest heart eyes?" charlie broke the small silence, a shit eating grin on his features when schlatt's head snapped to look at the other's camera. schlatt couldn't think of some witty comeback,a nd the silence was evidence enough the question got to him.

"woah, hold on. the j. schlattington found someone attractive?" ted chimes in with a wide smile, tilting his head. well fuck. there was no way out of this.

schlatt inhales sharply before running a hand through his hair. "her name is [y/n]. she's new, and we pretty much have the same schedule. she's a year younger than me, and super into music. every song that played at work today, she knew the words to. it was incredible!" he rambles on, before cutting himself off. oh god, he was rambling. about a girl. his cheeks must've been a bright pink, because both charlie and ted seemed just as shocked as schaltt.

"oh god. ted, we have to go to schlatt's. he's broken." charlie teased, before cackling along with ted. the taller male shakes his head, before exhaling.

"i just can't believe the schlatt is this down bad for someone he just met. i can hear the wedding bells." ted adds to the joking, in which schlatt rolls his eyes.

"i'm leaving." he mutters, ending the call. the chat suddenly was spammed with schlaaaatt, schlagg get ur ass back here, and whatnot. he only smiles, shaking his head before he glances to the time. jesus, they had been talking for hours... he sees a notification for a dm on discord, the ping noise catching his attention. oh yeah... he got [y/n]'s discord. with a thick swallow, he clicks the profile picture to open [y/n]'s dm.

[y/n]

hey schlatt!

wait fuck, no johnathan

jonathan?

this was a sucky first dm

sent at: 11:11 pm

schlatt only smiles, finding it absolutely adorable. he quickly types a reply, his hands shaking a bit.

jschlatt

just call me schlatt, toots

isnt it so cool you messaged me at 11:11

right when im done calling my pals

it was meant to be i guess

sent at: 11:11 pm

that was ballsy. but schlatt felt confident enough to type it out, too late to regret it. he eagerly waits for her response, getting up from his desk to pace. was it too direct? too weird? oh god it was happening again- ping! he hurriedly sits down, staring at the response with a dumb grin.

[y/n]

hey yeah

i guess it is meant to be!

i dunno if this is weird but

i was wondering if you wanted to like . hang sometime?

there was no worse to working with her. just better. she made it all better.