Mágoa | SB19 Josh [SB19 Series #4]

8

August 2025
Josh's POV

Three days after One Up TV's launching, I get a message from Grace.

She was leaving for Japan.

I texted her "Take care," and went back to focusing on my training. I tried to focuse, but my concentration was elsewhere.

Bat di niya sinabi na aalis siya today? Sana nahatid ko siya sa airport.

Bat ko naman siya ihahatid? Asawa ko ba siya?

Bano. Asawa mo siya.

Pero di ko naman siya lab. Bat ko siya ihahatid?

I was arguing with my self. Why was I arguing with my self?

I furiously scratched my head. Paulo looked at me warily.

"Anong problema mo?" Paulo asked.

"Nothing," I replied. I tried my best to ignore Paulo's look.

I tried my best to concentrate on training. During lunch time, Paulo handed me a bowl of sinigang. Tita Grace had stopped by earlier with Josue, Alex and Denise in tow. They were carrying a large pot of sinigang to share with SB19 and the dancers.

"Here," Paulo said.

"Thanks," I replied, gratefully accepting the sinigang.

I sipped. Then I sighed.

Ano oras ba flight niya? Nakarating na kaya siya?

Bwiset na sinigang. Naalala ko tuloy si Grace.

"Akin na nga yan. Galit ka ata sa sinigang eh," Paulo commented, his brows furrowed.

I smoothed my face. I was not aware that I was already glaring at the sinigang.

Bakit kasi sinigang pa dinala ni Tita Grace?

Not that I'm ungrateful. Tita Grace's cooking saved me during the years when I could not bring food during training. I was always short of money even though I was working as a call center agent. I had to help my mom and sister in paying for the bills. I could not even have savings because the bills were just too many.

I'm grateful for Tita Grace. I've treated her like my mom. I've treated all the other mothers as my mom. It's just that.....bat ba naman kasi sinigang dinala?

"Akin to," I gritted my teeth at Paulo.

He just looked at me like I lost my sanity.

Okay, maybe I was losing my sanity. Why was I being overly concerned with Grace? I've lived for the past eight years without thinking about her. So, why should I change my ways? Why should I think about her now? It was just a waste of time and a waste of my remaining three strong brain cells.

Liar! My brain chided at me. You thought about her. Don't lie to yourself, Josh.

I gritted my teeth in frustration. My brain was always my biggest enemy.

Okay, fine. I did think about her during the past eight years. Okay, brain. I concede.

It was just one time. Okay, maybe a few times. It was during the pandemic when my facebook timeline was filled with news about the rising cases of COVID in Tokyo. I immediately thought of Grace.

How is she? Is she safe?

I sent her a message in Messenger, asking about her whereabouts. But, I immediately unsent it. Baka majudge ako at isipin niya concerned ako.