Mágoa | SB19 Josh [SB19 Series #4]

17

Grace's POV

Josh had been taking care of me. Josh laid me on my bed when I collapsed from crying too much. Josh bought me food. Josh fed me in my bed because I didn't want to move.

Josh is my hero.

"Do you want to talk?" I asked him, shyly. Josh deserves to know the truth. He had stuck with me and took care of me in my vulnerable state. He of all people deserves to know the reason why I broke down earlier tonight.

"Only if you want to talk," Josh replied.

I wanted to cry. Josh was a rare find. He never pushes me to do things that I didn't want to do. He respects my decisions if I don't want to open up to him. He honors my space and is attentive to my boundaries.

Josh is everything that I've ever hoped for in a man.

Josh was a flying green flag.

How I'd wish that I met him before I've met all the other men in my life. How I'd wish that Josh and I were together, then maybe, I wouldn't be depressed.

"Josh, I have depression," I told him, closing my eyes in despair. I was scared to tell him about it. If only I could skip this part of my life. If only, then I would do it gladly.

Josh only nodded, not at all surprised by what I just said.

How?

"I know. I saw your meds," Josh replied softly.

I bit my lip. Of course he saw my meds. He was the one who gave them to me when I was too preoccupied with crying my eyes out.

"You can tell me everything but only if you really want to," Josh told me. He held my hand and gazed into my eyes. I could feel the sincerity of Josh's offer. I know he wanted me to feel that I was safe with him.

And I did feel safe with him.

I took a deep breath, trying to arrange the thoughts in my head. I had to start from the very beginning.

"Are you ready?" I asked Josh. He nodded at me.

"I..." I took another deep breath. "I have three ex boyfriends-Francis, Simon and Yuki-"

"Why are we talking about them? I don't want to talk about them," Josh interrupted. He huffed madly, then rolled his eyes.

I smiled a bit. Why did he look so adorable when he's jealous?

"I have to. That's where the story starts," I told him, snuggling my head to his chest. I smelled his neck. He smelled so heavenly.

Josh grunted. Stop being a jealous baby.

"Francis was an ex in Washington," I started to say. "We broke up because we could not do long distance. It was kind of a puppy love. I didn't really think much about him. Simon was an ex from college. He was from Ateneo.
We dated for a short time but I broke up with him because he cheated on me. Then, si Yuki-"

"Ano ba yan. Bilisan mo pagkwento," Josh complained.

I ignored him.

"I met Yuki in Tokyo. He was a gamer as well. He was a medical student when we met and we were in a relationship for five years-"

"You don't have to tell me the specifics," Josh complained. He rolled his eyes at me again.

Ang seloso ng bruho.

"Just let me finish, okay?" I asked him sofly, sidling closer to him. I reached for his hand and stroked his thumb, reassuring him.

He huffed. Like a little baby.