Aftereffects

Talk

I sat on the bed looking down at my hands 
"A was one of the hackers that helped me escape" I look up at Jake as he stares down at me
" You know other hackers?" I look at him surprised then nod
" I had been helping them while they taught me about hacking and how to avoid the government" I see the anger in Jake's blue eyes
" You're a hacker now?" He voice was calm and a little deeper than normal
" I had no other choice though I wouldn't say I'm a hacker" Jake arches his brow
" After saving Hannah I found out Richy was the man without a face'' I look down again
" I thought you had died with him Jake or that the FBI had gotten you" I frown
" Sam I told you I had to go into hiding" I laughed bitterly
" Yeah and then I never heard from you again Jake" he just looks at me
" I texted you, so many times hoping you'd give me a sign that you were safe" I clench my hands
" But you never did" I feel my heart aching
" I thought you were dead or worse that you were being held prisoner somewhere'' I tuck my hair behind my ear
" But now I know you've been alive  this whole time !" My nails bite into my palms
" Did I ever cross your mind?" I blurt out
" Sam..." I look up at him
" Because I thought of you everyday Jake and carried the pain of losing you all this time" I feel a tear fall onto my hand
" I lost everything that day the FBI hauled me into a room and tried to get me to confess to knowing you' I glare at the floor
" I had to pretend I killed myself so my sister's would be left alone" feeling my  nails bite deeper into my palms
" Then I had to hand over my cats so they didn't have to live in a cage" I hear the breaks in my voice
" My cat Cleo helped me get through the shit after I found out who Richy was and your disappearance" another tear hits my hand
"And I handed her over knowing I'd never see her again " I hear Jake move
" why didn't you talk to Jessica or the group?" I flinch
" Because after Hannah was rescued everyone stopped talking to me". I hear Jake inhale
" Pardon?"
I nod
" You heard me Jake no one had anything to do with me after that night we saved Hannah. I tried reaching out but no one ever wrote back" I unclench my fists seeing blood on my palms I sigh
" That was never supposed to happen they were supposed to be there for you to help you once I disappeared" I hear the anger in his voice
" The only one that kept in contact was Phil" I hear a low growl from Jake
" You kept in touch with Philip?" I nod
'' Yeah he was my only option on finding out how Hannah was" I glance up seeing irritation on Jake's face
" Jake" he looks at me
" Are you  jealous right now? He arches his brow
" You know how I feel about him Samantha" his voice is low, seductive sending a chill down my spine
" I do know how you feel about him Jacob " he looks away, running his hand through his jet black hair.
" I'm quite unsure why I am acting like this" he admits
" I have no right" he whispers I get up touching his arm
" Jake" he glances over at me I smile kissing his arm he chuckled
" Are you trying to make this harder?" I release his arm
" You're right I'm not being fair to you" I move back
" You're allowed to feel jealous Jake and other emotions as well" I feel Jake step closer his hand moving under my chin tipping my face up
" I know I am Sam but for me it could be dangerous" I nod looking into his eyes
" I know and that's why I'm trying to respect your boundaries" he nods
" I know you are" he says looking at me tenderly.