About two years ago, Linda decided to give the middle finger to birth control pills. Yes they did their job in the contraceptive area, but they did not do their job at regulating her period. On her twenty fourth birthday, she had decided she wanted to try for another baby. A year later, they pronounced her infertile, because she hadn't been able to get pregnant within that year. Both she and Danny found that utterly ridiculous because she had been pregnant, so clearly she wasn't infertile. After she had cried about it, she went out and brought new lingerie, then ambushed Danny with it. They didn't get much sleep that night.
One week in February, Linda noticed some blood in the toilet bowl. She couldn't tell if it was period blood or blood in the urine, and she freaked out. She cried for ten minutes before sucking up and calling her OBGYN. They made her an appointment at eight the very next morning.
**********
Danny came home around six that day, "honey, I'm home!"
When he didn't get an answer, he frowned. She usually listened to music while cooking, but not so loud she couldn't hear him. When he didn't find her in the kitchen, he walked upstairs to their bedroom. Maybe she got tomato sauce or something equally offensive staining her shirt.
"Linda?" He called as he walked in their home. To say he was shocked to see her curled in a ball and sobbing was an understatement. He quickly sat next to her, "Linda, honey, what's wrong?"
She swallowed some tears, trying to make her words comprehensible. "There's... blood. In my u-urine."
"It's not... it's not period blood?"
"It's too watery and not dark enough," she shook her head. "And I wouldn't be freaking out like this."
"Is... is it bad?"
She sat up after a moment, then wiped the tears from her eyes. "It's.... It's probably an infection."
"A urine infection? Why would there be blood in that? How'd you even get that?"
"I don't know." She sniffed, then took a long, calming breath. "I have an appointment tomorrow morning."
Linda shook her head and decided to be a grown up about this. "I'm sure it's nothing, Danny. Maybe I irritated something somehow. Or I'm.... I don't know. I don't know. But I'm not going to think about it. You shouldn't either."
**********
The bathroom that had the cup holder was in use, so she had to use the other one... with no cup holder. Linda wondered how to do it- she had never peed in a cup before. Did she set it on the lid? But what if she missed? Then her pee would be everywhere. She knew she had to hold it, but what if she dropped it into the toilet? What if she peed on her hand and still dropped it? What if she peed on her pants or shoes?
"This is the only time I wish I had a penis!" She mumbled angrily to herself, finally deciding to just do it.
After she peed, she twisted the cap and set it down on the floor. While she washed her hands, she thought that it wasn't so bad. She had worried for nothing.
She handed the nurse- who was apparently waiting for her- the cup, then headed back to the room.
After waiting about ten more minutes for the results, the doctor came in. Linda held her breath.
"It's all good news."
And if she hadn't been so relieved, she would've picked up on all. All as in more than one piece of news.
"You have an excess of white blood cells—"
Linda visibly relaxed at that, putting a hand over her heart.
"And you're pregnant."
She laughed. Her first response was to laugh because there was no way she was pregnant. No way. "Are- you're serious?"
"I don't joke about pregnancies, especially not with you, Linda."
"Ha!" She let out another laugh, not knowing how to process it. "I'm pregnant."
"Yes, you are. Congratulations! It's coming as a surprise, huh?"
"You could say that." She scratched her forehead and dropped her hand down to her side. "Pregnant."
***********
"Hey," Danny kissed her cheek as soon as he saw her. "What did the doctor say?"
"She said that I had an excess of white blood cells. Probably fighting off an infection waiting to happen. It should clear up in a few days. Maybe even hours."
"So all's good?"
"Mhmm," she nodded, hoping he couldn't tell she wanted to say more.
He kissed her before turning to wash his hands. "That's good. I like it when things are normal."
"Me too," Linda agreed. "Danny—"
"Yeah?"
"Never mind, it's not important," she lied. She was about to spring the news on him, but decided against it. She'd tell him tomorrow night during a fancy dinner. Just the two of them.
"You sure?"
"Yeah. Positive."
"Okay..." he didn't quite believe her, but he decided to drop it.
*******
Much to her dismay, he had to work Saturday night. She briefly thought about waiting another week, but she knew she couldn't keep it a secret for that long. She'd just have to tell him after Sunday dinner.
Speaking of Sunday dinner, she hoped no one noticed her wine going untouched. She loved her wine, so it would be weird of her not to drink any. She also hoped no one noticed she was about to get her fourth roll.
"Can you pass the bread please?"
Joe held it out to her so she could get another roll... or two.
"You sure are eating a lot," Jack commented.
"Never say that, that's rude."
"I'm just wondering. Normally you don't—"
"You'd be eating five rolls, too, if you were pregnant—" she cringed at her mistake. "Ooh..."
As suspected, everyone was shocked, talking over each other and congratulating her and Danny.
"Really?" Danny asked, not wanting to get too excited. The last time it had been a false alarm. "You're absolutely sure?"
"Surprise," Linda tried weakly, smiling and shrugging.
Danny hugged her and kissed her, and the rest of dinner she answered all the questions the family had.
