Chapter 25
Aniecea's pov:
A week passed by , I was still hanging out with Shay
December 5th , today marks 3 years Paxton has been gone
" Shay , wake up " I said shaking her .
" huh " she said with a groan
" can we go somewhere today ? " I said
" where ? " she said
" cemetery . ? " I said turning away ..
" why would you ... Uh . Never mind sure lets go " she said getting up
" okay . Thanks " i said putting my shoes on
" lemme get dressed and shit " she said heading to the bathroom
" alright "
A couple of minutes later , we got into the car and headed off
Me and Shay started listening to music and sang along
" Making my way downtown
Walking fast
Faces pass
And I'm home bound "
" staring blankly ahead ,
Just making my way
Making my way
Through the crowd "
" and I need you
And I miss you
And now I wonder ... "
( I had too man , I was watching the white chicks . ✊🏼😂 )
Me and Shay just started giggling
After a couple of minutes we finally arrived
We got out of the car and I headed to Paxton's grave
Just staring at it made me upset ..
I laid down some letters and put a rock on top of them so they won't fly away
" Hmm .. Well today marks another year that you have been gone "
Everything got silent for a minute .. Until I broke down
" WHY . " as tears started to flow down my face .
Shay quickly grabbed me , but I pushed her off me
" WHY . Why did you leave me , I'm so sorry for what I did .. " I said falling down onto my knees
" I lied . I love you . I love you . I love you . I fucking love you . " i said cover my face letting all the tears flow
" come back to me ! "
I started yelling , I didn't care if I looked crazy .. I was hurt and upset . I couldn't take it ..
It hurts more than ever now that's he's gone , I don't care if later on in the future I end up marrying Chandler or not . Doesn't matter what happens , Paxton will and always will be the first guy I will ever fucking love . Regardless of who I'm with .. He was my forever .
The pain was unbearable..
Shay grabbed me and hugged me really tight
She made me stop crying after a while ..
I stood up , and headed to the car
" I'm sorry .. " I said turning away from Shay
" you don't have to be sorry , he was the first person you loved and that feeling will always be there " she said half smiling at me
I smiled back , " thanks for everything Shay . "
" you're welcome .. " she said starting the car
It was silent , but peaceful ..
I just needed to get everything out of my mind , and this helped ..
A lot ..
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This chapter was boring , 😩
But 5 more chapters left and I'm done with this book 😋
