Grunt Work

Taking an Order

'Fresh meat,' Theo grinned wickedly, eyeing up the new recruits who had just walked into The Abyss. They were a large group, and older than most of us here, maybe in their thirties, and they all stood straight backed and in formation as if they were ready to go on the march. That was definitely odd. Even though I was ex-army, myself, and so were a lot of the rest of us grunts, I was pretty sure, we didn't stand around like we were on the parade ground. I wondered if I yelled an order for a quick march they'd automatically walk head first into the bar.

'Time to have some fun,' Manish rubbed his hands together and slipped out of the booth and into the crowd. I lost sight of him almost instantly.

'Maybe we should say hello?' I suggested. 'They look pretty lost.'

'Show them to the orgy room,' Johnnie replied, watching the group, as one, walk over to the bar. 'They won't look lost for long. Oh Christ, what is that piss they're ordering? Bloody Americans always get the weak beer.'

On the far side of the group, through their legs, I could see Manish on his knees, tying their shoelaces together before slipping back into the crowd. I snorted to myself, waiting to see them fall.

'Are those the pilots the Kaptain picked up from the air force base?' Katya asked. 'Mount...Cheyenne?'

'That was another base he hit on the way back,' I told her.

'You're thinking of Mountain Home,' Johnnie put in. 'Near Boise.'

'Sleep with one eye open, Outlander.'

Johnnie blew her a kiss, and took a sip of his drink, then spluttered over it as the American pilots fell over like beer soaked bowling pins. A cheer went up around the den.

'Oh no,' said Manish, sitting down besides us. 'Such a terrible accident. Who would do such a thing.'

'Who indeed,' Johnnie clinked Manish's glass with his own.

'Such a mess,' said a voice in my head, and I shot to my feet - as did everyone else. Winnie had just walked into the room. The Americans helped each other to their feet. She gave them just a brief glimpse, then looked around the room. 'The election campaign is on hold while we gather the necessary intelligence for our next step,' she told us, her head swiping back and forth like it was on a swivel. 'I need volunteers to act as runners.'

'I volunteer,' Katya said immediately. I stepped aside to let her through - and fell flat onto the ground. My shoelaces were tied, too.

'Thank you, Katya. And you, too, Kaia. In your eagerness you seem to have tripped over your own feet.'

'Sorry, ma'am. Just a little uncoordinated today,' I said, looking at Manish. He looked ahead, unconcerned.

'Fix that immediately,' Winnie told me. 'And the rest of your squad can help. Since you're staying at the base for the foreseeable future,' she paused and her third eye flashed blue. 'Yes, for the foreseeable future.'

Johnnie and Theo groaned.

'What was that?' Winnie asked sharply.

'Nothing, sir,' the two said at once.

Winnie squinted at them with all of her eyes. 'Very well,' she looked around the bar again. 'The rest of you may continue,' she left, and the rest of the bar patrons let out a collective breath.

'Well, fuck,' Johnnie said.

'We're dead,' Theo said.

'Don't be such babies,' Katya scolded them.

'Yeah,' I backed her up. 'Winnie's all right. And it sounds like an easy enough job.'

'You call her Winnie?' Manish asked me, looking like I'd used a terrible swear word.

'Well, yeah. What do you call her?'

The other four shared a look. 'Her full name, of course,' Johnnie said, and he sounded strangely guarded.

I kept thinking about this as we made our way up to the command centre. I couldn't understand it, but they seemed scared of her. I mean, sure, she's the boss and all - under the Kaptain, obviously - but she's still just a regular human-adjacent person.

'We can't just go in,' Theo whispered furiously, as we reached the entrance

'Why not?' I asked, confused. The door was unlocked so I just went in. The guards didn't even stop me.

If I'd thought The Abyss was packed, it had nothing on the command centre. There were maps everywhere. Maps of the Pacific. Maps of New Zealand. Maps of Hawai'i. Korea. Maps of the Americas. And a huge map of the US that took up the entire table in the centre of the room, and which most of the people, including the Kaptain, were huddled around.

'We could always hit Kitsap,' said one of the henchlings by the Kaptain's side. I hadn't met him, though I knew him to be call the Wrecking Ball. Mr Ball nodded to me. 'We can bring the beast along to help.'

'It's cold in Seattle, this time of year,' the Kaptain complained. He pointed to another place on the map. 'Now, Nellis on the other hand. Nevada, eh? We can hit the base in the morning, have the evening playing the slots in Vegas. Take in a show maybe. How about it? We can even pop by Area 51 on the way home. Say hi to the aliens.'

'I don't think that's such a good idea, sir,' said Winnie. 'They've increased security since we last dropped by, and we'll have dangerous materials in tow. Kaia, take our coffee orders.'

'That's what our new air force is for,' the Kaptain grumbled. 'They can fly the bombs back while we take the scenic route.'

'What about Malstrom?' Winnie suggested.

'It's in Montana,' the Kaptain shook his head. 'We already hit that air force base up there. Not a good idea to hit the same area twice. Besides, does Montana have casinos? I think not. I'll have a flat white with six shots in it,' he said that last to me, as I hovered by his shoulder to take his order. 'Yes, Vegas is the way to go.'

'Nellis,' Winnie corrected.

'That's what I said. Nellis. Nellis - and then Vegas. We can do a heist! And then meet Glorpil!'

I returned with his drink and he drank it in one. He started to vibrate, steam rolling off his entire body. 'Yes. Vegas. Then Washington. And then the world is mine!'