!tw!
song of this chapter : dealer - lana del rey
*BEEP*
third person (no ones pov) :
Tommy wakes up due to the uk sun shining through his blinds.
he groans and rolls out his bed and checks the time.
Tommy's pov :
I check the time and its 3:50 p.m.
FUCK I WAS SUPPOSED TO STREAM AN HOUR AGO.
I jump out a bed so fast causing me to get a head rush and everything goes black, I slowly regain my vision and go to the bathroom and cover the bruises up with concealer I use to cover bruises up, then I go throw on a hoodie, I go to my pc and boot it up I go to streamlabs, and press live, the stream title is 'one roast go." I put my persona on, andddddddd.
"WELCOME BACKKKKKKKK TO THE STREAM! Today were doing 'one roast go' since I had this amazing idea totally didnt steal it from ksi" I force a laugh.
"SO BASICALLY MY EGO HAS BEEN GETTING REALLY BIG RECENTLEY LIKE A LOOK IN THE MIRROR AND I GO, FUCKKK, LOOK AT THOSE GUNS.MMMM" I lie, when I look in the mirror I want to kill my self, having to stare at how fat I am, at all the bruises around my body.
I go to discord where everyone is in the waiting room. There still there?
"ALSO SORRY FOR BEING 1 HOUR I HAD TO DO SOMETHING"
40 Minutes into the stream :
"one roast go."
"tommy, I bet that biscuit that you ate earlier, is the only thing you ate all day, cause of how skinny you are"
It was true Ive only ate a biscuit all day its the 1 thing ive eaten in 2 days, ate so chat wouldnt say anything about that but guess that didnt work-
"I know and im not proud of my skiny-ness" I say and kick them from call.
25 minutes later I end stream, that one person kind of made me uncomfortable to stream longer.
I end stream and then call wil.
"HEY BIG MANNNN!"
"AYUP TIMMYINNIT"
"I just have a question, are you gonna pick me up or what?"
"mhm!" wil says
"OKAY THANKS WIL."
"ANY TIME! also how are you doing today since you said you were drained yesterday :)?" wil aks. Hah... Im drained everyday, tired everyday, but wil dosent need to know that for now.
"I'm uh- doing- better mhm!"
"tommy... No need to lie... If you keep lying I won't believe you when you tell the truth-.." Wilbur says.
"im sorry wil- It's just you worry so much and I hate it..."
"tommy... Its cause I care!"
"mhm" I hang up.
CUT
CUT
CUT
CUT
CUT YOUR SELF YOU DISGUSTING PIG (A/n: just a TAD bit aggressive)
alright just shut up...
I get up and go to the bathroom grab the razor, and I just cut.
When im finished I have 6 on each arms, I clean everything up and pass out on my bed from how dizzy I was from cutting so deep.
Great right before we meetup...
-----------------------
The girl from my class (yk who u are) we don't talk about this, okay? THIS IS OUR SECRET. OK????
YOU ARE READING
I give up. |Tommyinnit angst|
Fanfictionthis book was meant to be me just giving up on writing but yk I had to turn it into a book lmao !TW!//SH/ED/ABUSE/ANXIETY/OVERTHINKING/PANIC ATTACKS/SELF HATRED/SWEARING/VOMITING/SUICIDAL THOUGHTS// THERE WON'T BE A WARNING AT THE TOP OF EACH PAGE...
