A Series Of Life Changing Events

Chapter 22: Mother's Day

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Sorry I haven't been writing as often as I used to. I haven't had much time lately. I'll try my best to update at least once a week. I apologize for not doing my gosh darn job.

Saturdays are the best. I just wish they lasted longer. You go through a whole week of living hell and then you only get two days off. That just doesn't seem right. This is an injustice to the world. I wish it was still Saturday, but instead it's stupid Sunday. I hate Sundays. They're filled with homework that you put off until the last minuet. This Sunday is the worst of them all. It's Mother's Day. This wouldn't be so bad if my mother was actually living. Gerard and I have gotten close enough to the point where I can call him my dad without a second thought, but not Lindsey. She's an amazing person and I love her, but she's not my mom. I was very close with my mom. She was my best friend before the incident. We were closer than close, inseparable. I just can't bring myself to call Lindsey mom. I feel like I'm doing something wrong. It feels weird. Bandit comes racing into my room pulling Gerard behind her. I smile and laugh at his confused face. "So what exactly have you called this secret meeting for?" He asks looking down at Bandit. "It's mommy's special day so we gotta do something!" She says with excitement. We already got her present, but Bandit wanted to make her breakfast or something. "What if we sneak in and turn off her alarm clock and then we make breakfast. Bandit I'm also pretty sure she'd love it if you made her an art project." I say remembering Lindsey's love for art. "Yeah!" She squeaks pulling Gerard out of the room. We head down to the art room and supervise Bandit as she does her thing. We help from time to time, but mostly let her be creative. She decided to paint. It's kinda messy, but I'm sure Lindsey will love it. When she finishes it it actually looks really good. Who knew a child could paint something so fantastic. It looks abstract. "Go wash your hands I'll be there in a minuet." Gerard says smiling down at her. I get up to walk out of the room, but I hear a voice calling my name. "Hey Lil, can you come here for a minuet?" I here Gerard ask as I turn around and walk back to him. "Can I ask you a question?" He asks. "You just did." I say as I begin to laugh. "You know what I meant." He says cleaning up the paint. "Yeah, you can ask me anything." I say handing him a couple paint brushes. "I've noticed that you call me your dad all the time, but you haven't called Lindsey mom at all. Not even once. Why are you comfortable with call me dad, but not calling Lindsey mom?" He asks me and I drop a pint brush. I quickly bend down to pick it up. "I uh...I didn't have the best relationship with my father. We fought all the time. Most days I even hated him. He never really treated me fairly. He was the worst. I was so close to my mom. She was my best friend. I can move on from my dad easily, but I can't call Lindsey my mom. The day I do that is the day I lose my mother for forever." I say as I try to hold back the tears threatening to break from the damn, also known as my face holes, also also (Yes, I know there is a second also and it was not a typo.) known as my eyes. He puts a hand on my shoulder and pulls me into a hug. "You're never gonna lose her. You can't undo the fourteen years of memories you have with her." He says kissing me on the forehead. "I have an idea. How about later, after we give Lindsey her present we can go to the cemetery and visit your mom?" He says pulling me away slightly to look down at me. He whips my tears with his thumb as he waits for an answer. "Yeah, I would like that." I answer sighing. There I hear the sound of little foot steps. Bandit is coming. I try to keep my cool. She'd be confused if she saw me cry. After the day's events are over it's somewhere around three o'clock. I hop in the car with Gerard and Bandit and we head off. Bandit was supposed to stay home with Lindsey, but she insisted on coming with us. She said she wanted to meet my mommy. We get to the cemetery and Bandit runs ahead of us. We hop out of the car and I immediately grab onto Gerard. This is probably an odd fear, but I'm afraid of cemeteries and dead people. It's a stupid fear, but I've had it since I was really little. I haven't been here since the funeral. Gerard puts his arm around me and pulls me close. "Are you sure you want to do this?" He asks in a calming voice. I nod and start walking to my mother's grave. We sit down next to the stones of my parents. They're side by side. "Hey mom." I say letting tears flow from my eyes as I turn away from the grave stone and hug Gerard. Bandit plops down behind the stone and stares at it. "Hi Mrs. Lily's mommy!" Bandit says cheerfully. How can she be this happy?! Look at where we're fucking standing! I guess it's not really her fault. She hasn't experienced death yet. She doesn't understand it yet. Her tinny mind hasn't even brushed over the subject. I wish my mom could see how cute Bandit is and how wonderful Gerard and Lindsey are. I wish she could have been over protective about Noah and I dating. I wish she could have taken Jess and I to a concert or made us breakfast after a sleepover. There are so many things in this world people just take before thinking. They don't stop to think what their life would be like without it and when they finally realize it's too late because what they had is already gone. After we spend some time at the gave we decide to head home. We get home and I go straight to my room. I just need to be alone. After a couple hours I hear a knock on my door. "Go away." I say emotionlessly and slam a pillow over my head. "Sorry, I can't do that." I hear Lindsey's voice say as she opens the door and let's herself in. She comes over to me and sits down next to me on my bed. "Gee told me about why you don't call me mom." She says and then there is a silence. Why did he tell her? Why wouldn't he tell her? Now I feel kinda bad. "I get it." She says breaking the silence. "You do?" I ask shifting on the bed. "Hell yeah. There hasn't even been a year since your mom's passing. I'd still be a wreck right now if I were in your position. You're one of the strongest people I've ever met. I can't expect everything from you." She says and I begin to crack a smile. "I GOT HER TO SMILE YOU OWE ME FIVE BUCKS!" She yells out the door. "Darn it!" Gerard says with a sigh and he walks into the door. I begin to laugh. "I made her laugh! We're even!" Gerard says standing next to the bed. "No way! That was a group effort!" She says pushing him lightly. "You guys were betting on me?!" I ask continuing to laugh. "What else would we do to make parenting interesting?" Lindsey says laughing. "Come downstairs. It's time for dinner." Gerard says leaving the room as Lindsey and I follow. I have a pretty strange family, but at the end of the day they're cool.