The Failure That Is Moi :3

The Dog Poo Incident

See this story is why I do not take part in exercise. I was on a bike and my mom was running beside me (she was training for a half marathon). She said that she wanted some company so I agreed to go.

So we had went a far distance, I was dying from too much exercise and wanted my bed with a cup of tea. It had already pissed down with rain, so I was soaked. I'd had many awkward encounters with other cyclists and dogs that were a bit too friendly. But oh no that was not the worst of it. See I thought I would get rewarded with being a little fitter, nope clearly I deserved to be punished. We were reaching the end of our little adventure, when an old couple were walking on the trail. I thought I'd be a good human being and move out of the way, I moved onto the grass edge so the old couple were able to get past. It turned out that when I had been riding on the grass I had risen straight into dog shit. Oh great. It was on both wheels, this part is the worst. I hadn't realised that my bike wheel was covered in dog shit until quite a while later. By the time I realised the dog shit had covered my bike. It gets worse. The whelk had flicked the dog shit up my back and covered my neck. My neck it was disgusting, what made it worse that because it had been raining the dog shit was now more a liquid than a solid. We ended up having to call my dad to bring some tissues. Lots of it.

Moral of the story: Please pick up your dogs shit, as a bike rider may run over it and it may cover their clothes and face with your pets dinner. Also if you're a biker watch where you're going unless you wanna end up as I did.

Having a shower that day was disturbing and disgusting.

Thank y... wait there's more

Literally a few weeks ago we went to the same place... where I had discovered my little incident. I said to my mom at the top of my voice
"MOM DO YOU REMEMBER WHEN I RODE IN THAT DOG SHIT!!"
Now my mom was mortified, I was mortified, runners were mortified, OAPS were mortified and I also seen a few dogs look mortified.

Thank you
Benson :3