Life's Better When You Gotta Bassist In It // L.A. Guns •Kelly Nickels•

The One Thing I so Heavily Believe in, I Just Broke

I got to my mom's house and she opened the door after I knocked. She had a glass of whiskey in her hand. This time, I couldn't blame her. "Hey Erin." She said, she wasn't shitfaced like she normally was. She was drinking because she was sad.

"Hey Mom, how are you doing?" I asked her. "As good as I can be I guess, how about you?" She asked. I put my head in my hands. "Terrible. Dad is gone and life is taking a toll on me." I said.

She looked at me and smiled. "Tell me about it." I nodded. "I've been thinking...I want you to write your dad's eulogy." She said. I looked at her and then to the glass in her hand. "Okay...what am I supposed to say?" I asked her.

"Talk about how you too were close how good of person he was, too bad he got caught up in drugs, how we lost a good soul too soon." She said. I nodded.

"Can I have one of those?" I asked looking to her glass. I couldn't keep thinking about it, I couldn't stop thinking about breaking the one thing I so heavily believe in. She nodded and got me a glass. She poured some whiskey in it and handed it to me.

I smelled it. "It's not gunna bite you Rin." My mom said. Rin was a nickname that she and my dad gave me, I haven't heard it since I was in diapers. I nodded and put the glass to my lips and downed it. It burned my throat, but the taste, it tasted good. I thought it would taste like poison.

I sat the glass down and she poured me another and I drank it. I only had three. "Do you have a black dress I can wear to the funeral tomorrow?" I asked my mom. She nodded and I followed her upstairs to her bedroom.

She opened her closet and pulled out a black dress and handed it to me. It was short sleeves, was built like a pleated skirt at the bottom and ended in the middle of my thighs. "Thanks Mom." I said. She nodded. "I'll see you tomorrow."

I left and drove to my work. I have to take tomorrow off. I made to the Whiskey and walked in. "Hey Erin, I thought you were off today?" My boss asked me. I nodded. "Oh, I am, I just have to take tomorrow off." I said.

He looked at me and furrowed his eyebrows. "Why, we're under staffed." He said. "Look, I know, but it's important I have a funeral to go to tomorrow." I said he nodded, "but your working that night." He said. I nodded.

I then went back to the apartment. I grabbed the dress and walked up the stairs
To the apartment and opened the door. The guys were sat in the living room writing. "Hey Erin." Steve said. I waved at him.

"What are you holding?" Tracii asked. I took the dress off of my shoulder and showed them. "A dress for my dads funeral tomorrow. And My mom has decided to give me the responsibility of writing his eulogy." I said with fake enthusiasm.

"Ouch." Mick said and I nodded. I went to my room and sat the dress on my bed. I walked back out and went to the kitchen. I started opening various cabinets. "What are you looking for?" Phil asked. I was still looking through cabinets as I answered him. "Whiskey." I said.

"Whiskey, aren't you supposed to be like, alcohol free?" Kelly asked. I nodded. "I'm turning over a new leaf, rather it be for the better or the worst, I honestly don't fucking care." I said as I found some Whiskey. I got a glass and poured some of the whiskey in it and downed it. "And besides, if I'm gunna be writing my dad's eulogy, I'm gunna need this." I said.

I looked at the guys and none of them knew what to say. "And it's not a big deal, this is my fourth." I said, holding up the empty glass. "I'm not gunna become a raging psychotic alcoholic like my mother." I said. I put the whiskey back and the glass in the sink.

"If you need me. I'll be in my room." I said, walking to my room and closing the door. I grabbed a notebook and a pen.

My dad. My first best friend I had in this world. Although he was always coming and going in my childhood, he made sure we always got to spend time together. He taught me right from wrong even though a majority of the choices he made weren't that great. I remember when he used to sing you are my sunshine to me every night before bed. I wish he had gotten over his addiction but all good and bad things must come to an end, no matter how hard it is to see them go...weather it's good or bad. My dad was a good man and I don't think he deserved the ending to life that he got. This world lost a good soul too soon. You are my sunshine, my only sunshine, you make me happy when skies are gray, you'll never know dear, how much I love you. Please don't take my sunshine away. Mom and I love and miss you Dad.

Satisfied with what I had, I put it on my nightstand and got changed into pajamas. It was 3 in that afternoon and I didn't want to go out into the living room because of Kelly. I put my Walkman on and listened to music.

Around 5 something I decided to go to the kitchen. I hadn't eaten all day. I got up and went to kitchen. The guys left and I didn't see Kelly. Guess I didn't have to stay in my fucking room for the rest of the day, which I was glad.

I made myself a sandwich and went to the couch, turning on the tv. After I ate I put my plate in the sink, went to grab my blanket, and went back to the couch. I then fell asleep on the couch.

(Kelly's POV)

Erin's been giving me the cold shoulder and I couldn't fucking blame her. I was worried about her. She drank. When I met her she was very fucking serious about never drinking ever in her life.

I went out with the guys. They were all drinking and what not. I couldn't drink, I have to find a way to fix things between Erin and I. Eventually we decided to leave and I went back to the apartment.

I opened the door and saw that Erin was asleep on the couch. I smiled at her and sat my keys down on the kitchen counter. I'd have to fix things with her, and soon. I walked over to the couch and picked her up bridal style. I carried her to her room and laid her on the bed.

I then turned to leave. "Thank you." I heard her say quiet and tiredly. I knew she was pissed at me still, but she was too tired to care. I walked out and shut her door and walked to my own room, changing clothes and getting into bed.

I went to sleep thinking of ways to fix things between us.

Jesus fucking Christ I love this girl.

(End of Kelly's POV)