Vent book ( TW )

Im running out of titles names help

So. Yall know how people can get triggered by stuff. Like in movies and shit, they just cant watch certain bits because it freaks them out. Im one of those people. Ok if you have seen 'The princess bride' then you will probs know what im talking about. You know that scene where the dude is like in the machine with the water and all that? Yeah...I had to literally run out of the room because i was about to cry and it just freaked me the fuck out. I like that movie ok? With that once bit which is like 'Hello, my name is Inigo Montoya, you killed my father. Prepare to die.' But that one scene with the water machine thingy was literal hell. I just couldn't watch it. Because when I literally force myself to watch these things, I can't stop thinking about then for so so so long. I mean like a whole year sometimes. And you may think "then just dont watch them no big deal." But it is a big deal. It makes me feel wimpy and stupid, because everyone can watch stuff I can't. Like in history we were doing the slave trade, and I already just really didn't like it because PEOPLE WERE LITERALLY TREATED SO BAD AND I WANTED TO CRY AND HUG THEM EVEN THOUGH THAT WONT HELP BUT LIKE I FEEL SO BAD FOR THEM!But then we watched a video about the middle passage and then they had a little re-enactment of a slave getting beat on a ship. I was already STRESSED THE FUCK OUT because it was intense music and i just NO. So when i got to the bit where the slave was about to be hurt what did i do? I SPED OUT THE ROOM TOP SPEED INTO THE CORRIDOR NEXT TO THE CLASSROOM, I SWEAR IVE NEVER RUN SO FUCKING FAST IN MY LIFE, I SIT AT THE FRONT SO I JUST GOT UP AND I LEGGED IT PAST THE BOARD I SWEAR I WAS SPEEDING!!! Then i heard the teacher pause the vid, and say "did she go to the bathroom or something?" And my friend who knew i got triggered easily said something like "she gets triggered by this kinda stuff sometimes, should i check on her?" And she came out into my little corridor and i was like GURL HELP I CANNOT WATCH THAT VIDEO NO NO NO. Then i came back in the teacher was like "its ok to not like this stuff, when my year nine class were doing the holocaust  (i cant spell it) and they put a tube up a girls nose one person had to leave the room." And thats meant to reassure me but it did not. Now all i can think about is doing that topic and not being able to learn ANYTHING. Oh also another friend said i ran out so fast she didn't even realise i had gone. I told you i was fast. Anyways, i now get nervous every history lesson and am terrified for future history lessons. Hooray..(sarcasm)