The Kents

Thirty Seven

"I haven't been doing that..." He replies nonchalantly to my presence by his side in the god damned car.

"Like hell you aren't! There you go. You're even avoiding the eye contact!" I fume with irritation.

"I'm not ignoring you!" He exclaims.
"Yes you are! And I hate you for it!" The words rush out of my mouth and I only realize what they meant when it was too late.

But I didn't care. He had to know that I hate him for it and I hate him for having me on a constant verge of crying. I hate that I need his attention, and that I need him as a whole!

He turns to me with eyes filled with rage.
He takes an abrupt stop at the side of the streets causing the tires to screech.
My heart slams down to the pit of my stomach.

He leaves the car and I watch as he gets to my side.
The door swings open and I freeze, breathless.

He takes me by the arm and begins to pull me but I'm frightened of him. So I pull my arms away and press my back to the car.

"I'm not going anywhere with you." I gulp.
He stares at me with shady expanded eye pools.

"Not when you're like that..." I state.
My eyes have forgotten how to blink.
They water from the crisp air surrounding us.

"What's your problem?!" I raise my voice and blink once.

"You're my problem!" He raises his voice and it slices through the air.

"Why the fuck did you kiss me Luke?" I push him with my bare hands right in his chest.
My gesture baffles him. His face falls in confusion.

You brought it on your self Luke Kent!

I wasn't going to fear him for long.

It could be the end of me!

"Answer me!" I bring myself closer to him and yell.

"What are you saying?" He replies instantly.

"Exactly what you've just heard!"
"You said it wasn't good!" I blink and a tear escapes.

No no no please don't start trembling.
I mentally beg my figure.

"Was it just an impulse? An urge like you told me before?" My voice cracks.

He frowns at me uncomprehending...
His eyes inspecting all of me.

"Did you feel-" I cover my mouth with my palm and shut myself up looking away, anywhere but at his face that expressed pity and sorry...

I couldn't...

I don't know if I'll be able to handle his answer to that.

He throws his head backwards, shuts his eyes, then sighs.

I feel him take a few step towards me before taking a hold of my two fisted hands and stopping them from shaking.

"Why does this happen to you?" He refers to my shaky legs and mess of a figure.

I spare him a look before looking down at myself.

I swear if it wasn't for his grasp keeping me still, I wouldn't know what would've happened to me.
That's just how it is.
Stress governs me.

"Did I feel anything? Is that your question?" He whispers forcing me to look towards him.

His eyes were soft and his face looked tired.

"From feeling nothing, to feeling everything all at once. The pain, the pleasure, and the strength to pull away..."

My heart jerks...