Chapter 16. Still Not There (Sexual content)

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That evening there was a major rearrangement of the sleeping arrangements

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That evening there was a major rearrangement of the sleeping arrangements.  Terry, Bucky, and Steve were put in Nathaniel's room, while Tommy, Nathaniel and Cooper shared the latter's room.   Originally Clint said Bucky could stay with Lacey but he demurred, saying it wasn't fair to put that burden on her when it was the first time they had seen each other in person since the one night they spent together almost nine years previous.  Terry wasn't happy about sharing a room with the man who made his sister cry so Bucky volunteered to sleep on the couch in the living room.  As he settled on the couch with a pillow and blanket, wearing a borrowed pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt he heard someone coming down the stairs.  With a sigh he turned, looked at the stairs and was surprised to see Terry.

"Really, I don't mind sleeping on the couch Terry," said Bucky wearily.  "I promise to stay here and not go to Lacey's room."

"That's not why I came down," said Terry as he sat on an armchair across from Bucky.  "I couldn't sleep.  I'm the last person to be angry at you for making Lacey cry.  I avoided her for years and when I did see her I treated her like shit.  I looked down on my own sister for so many years because I wasn't a good man when I was playing pro football."

Bucky sat up and looked at the man.  "Why is that?" he asked.

"Too busy living the high life," said Terry.  "Literally.  I was an imposter.  Terrified of being found out by my teammates, my fans, my coaches ....  I acted like I was in control of my career and really I felt that if anyone knew the truth about me my career would be over.  My family were a reminder of who I used to be, the guy who just wanted to fit in."

"So what changed?" asked Bucky.

"She met you, got pregnant, had to go on the run from the Russian mob, go into hiding from the CIA and HYDRA...," he paused.  "When our mom died and Lacey told me all that she had been facing, alone, I felt ashamed that I had given my entourage more attention than her.  So when she called to say Clint left because of losing his family it became my chance to step up and be the man I should have been all along.  The fact that for five years I've been her protector made me possessive of her.  I'm sorry."

"I wanted to marry her as soon as I found out about Tommy," admitted Bucky.  "But I got my arm shot off, I still had activation words implanted in my brain that would turn me into the Winter Soldier, and I was a mess.  She told me to go to Wakanda and get fixed first.  Then Thanos happened, and the Snap took five years of my life from me.  Five years away from her and Tommy.  I should have come here with Clint as soon as I could but Steve had something that couldn't wait and I owed him my life.  He saved me, Terry."

"Yeah," he replied with understanding.  "He told me.  Whatever you need to do to finish your obligations just do it.  I'll stay with her and Tommy.  Then when you're ready I'll step aside and start living my own life."

"You don't have to do that," said Bucky.  "Tommy loves you.  He told me how you've been helping him train.  You can live with us as long as you want.  I don't want to come between Lacey and you."

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