Coffee - Kuroken

Chapter 20 - Past

 I paced back and forth in my room, trying to breathe steadily. This was the day. My graduation. I was losing my mind.

"It's time for dinner!" my mom called from downstairs, and I walked down there, grabbed my plate, and walked back upstairs. There was no way that I was going to talk to anyone at that moment. The food was good, but that was drowned out by my thoughts about how I was going to walk up there, when, and how this whole thing would work.

I was still trying to process what happened 3 weeks prior. I scarfed down my food, and began pacing again. My nerves were killing me. I sat down at my desk, and put my head in my hands, trying anything I can to calm myself down.

Although, my breaths were getting shorter, and I was done trying to fight what was bound to happen. I let go, and my tears came cascading down my face, silently falling onto the wood of my desk. I just laid there, trying to collect myself.

"C'mon asshole you have somewhere to be." I said to myself, and got up to put on my nicer clothes for the ceremony, and took a deep breath before digging through my messy closet to find something to wear.

As I made myself more presentable, everything seemed too bright, and every sound was too loud. I tried to pick up some clothes, but it was too much for my brain to handle. When I checked my hair, I almost screamed.

"I need to stop." I stormed out of my room, trying to compose myself still. I walked into my bathroom, and put some gel in my hair, noticing that it was especially bad today.

"It's time to go!" My mom called for me, and I walked down the stairs, and put on my shoes before leaving to go to the school with my mom. She said nothing as we pulled into the parking lot, and we got out of the car. I walked to the football field and found my seat, sitting down even though the ceremony wasn't for another two hours.

"Hey Kuroo!" I heard a voice from next to me, and looked over to see Yaku, someone from my Biology class.

"Hi," I answered, allowing him to start the conversation, because I was too exhausted to do so myself.

~~

Everyone had sat down, and the valedictorian did a boring speech before some rows started standing up. A lot of time went by before my row was told to stand and get in line.

The line went by rather slowly, and about 30 people out from me, everything hit me. I was done. Graduated. This was it. I walked with more of a shake in my body now, and every second I was closer to having to walk up to that stupid platform.

After what felt like 5 hours, I stepped onto the platform, and looked out to where my parents were, noticing a space between them. He would've been there. My mind started spiraling again, wondering if Kenma would have come to this ceremony if it hadn't all been ruined that night. I guess I was lost in my thoughts, because the principal had to tap my shoulder and usher me to where my diploma was.

"Sorry about that." I apologized, pasting a smile on my face for the time being. This was embarrassing. After walking off of the platform, I went to where everyone else was, which was inside the school. They made everyone go there for "space for everyone else", but I think they just wanted it to be over quicker.

I clutched the paper in my hand, and thought about what I would do, and what could possibly happen in the next chapter of my life. Where will I go?